


Glory Days

by SuilaidRowan



Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Adult Content, Adventure, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alcohol Withdrawal, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Character Development, Developing Relationship, Dragonborn (Elder Scrolls), Elf/Orc Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fantasy, Internal Conflict, Love, Mages Guild, Magic, Orcs, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Redemption, Romance, Sex, Sexual Tension, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Starting Over, Tension, Work In Progress, orc smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-05-24 09:39:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 24,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14952224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuilaidRowan/pseuds/SuilaidRowan
Summary: 8 years after the Dragonborn slays Alduin, he's nothing more than a depressed drunk. Then he meets a young elf that re-kindles his love for adventures.





	1. Chapter 1

It's surprising how quickly life turns dull when you're no longer fighting dragons for the future of Skyrim's safety. Perhaps dull is too mild of a word because some days Malath wanted to smack his head against a wall just for the possibility it may be entertaining. Some days he nearly would. The Dragonborn had all these houses scattered across the country, and they're empty except for the housecarl that lives there. If he ever visits one of them, which is rare, it's different now.

Eight years have passed since Malath slew Alduin in Sovengarde, and five years since his life has slowly but steadily begun a descent into madness. His body is too riddled with aches and pains that someone his age shouldn't be receiving for another couple of decades. He took on a nearly impossible task, and his physical being shows the price he paid. Nobody truly knows how it's impacted Malath emotionally; he may be crippled but he's too stubborn to let his feelings show. Some of his old ways haven't completely abandoned him.

Now he spends his days wallowing in self-pity, rambling to himself about how shitty his life is because he's too sickly to play outdoors with all the other kids. His housecarls no longer look up at him with anticipation and wonder when he would stumble into the house unannounced, half dead and laden with treasures from his adventures. There was always a story on his lips, always a tale to be heard. Not anymore. Those tales have been told, the songs have been sung, and now they're forgotten. News around Skyrim is the civil war these days, bigheaded Nord men stamping their feet and having tantrums over the Empire and its ridiculous ways.

Nobody reminisces about the day the Dragonborn saved their village or city from a terrifying beast, or when he saved all of Skyrim from being destroyed completely. He's been reduced to textbooks and history, just a shell of what used to be his glory days. Nobody told Malath how hollow he'd feel once all was said and done...

* * *

Malath slowly cracked one eye open, feeling the warmth of the morning sun on his face. But for him, it held no comfort in its caress. It was just a reminder that another day had started yet again and that he'd rather be asleep. He liked it better when he was unconscious, or drunk. Whichever came first was okay with him. He groaned and rolled onto his side, feeling nauseous, which was obviously from the night of drinking he had coerced with. His newest hobby was being the town drunk since skooma went terribly wrong. He couldn't stomach that stuff. Malath tried to sit up. The room swam before his bloodshot eyes, and he quickly slumped back down on the bed and took a couple of deep breaths. Sharp pain pounded against his skull and it felt as though his brain was letting him know just how much of a pathetic excuse of an Orc he'd become. Each pound reminded him of his miserable life.

_Who would ever want to see the Dragonborn in this state? I'd be a disgrace._

So that's why he lived alone in Whiterun.

Malath finally managed to bring himself to a standing position. He shuffled his bare feet across the cold wood floor, shivering at the cool morning air that came in from the broken window.

 _Ah,_  he sighed, feeling a bittersweet pang in his chest.

_I remember how that happened, back when entertaining women was an exciting pleasure when I was desired for my fame and power. There had been this one, in particular, a fiery Redguard with the most unusual interest in…_

Anyways, needless to say, they broke the window, and Malath nearly broke his back, but that was years ago and he never bothered to fix it. He doesn't bother to do much of anything anymore.

_I'm only kept alive because of the pension I'm paid, you know, for saving Skyrim and all._

Malath rubbed his bearded chin. It was long over-due for a shave, but he couldn't care less about his appearance. Women stopped looking his way once he stopped going outside for anything more than food and booze.

He somehow made it down the stairs without stumbling and rummaged through the food cupboard, ignoring the looks of Lydia when she entered into Breezehome.

"Good morning my Thane," she greeted him, and he grunted in response.

Malath knew his lack of social skills got on the Nord's snobby nerves, but she did as best of a job as she could to hide her annoyance. Too bad he wasn't a complete idiot. He noticed the slight frown on her face, the flash of frustration in her simple brown eyes when he glanced her way.

"What do you want?" He asked bluntly, enjoying how much his rudeness set the woman off. Currently, it was his only form of entertainment besides drinking. Malath found it rather funny that the woman held such high standards in mannerisms and social etiquette when she was built like a Horker and fought like a brown bear.

"I only came to see how my Thane is faring, and to see if there were anything I could do," Lydia replied as sweetly as she could muster.

She was doing a terrible job, and he enjoyed it. This routine was a habit of hers he had failed to stop. Lydia was like a stinky old cat nobody liked that kept coming back for food no matter how many times you abused it. Malath ripped a chunk of stale bread off with his teeth and noisily chewed on it while staring thoughtfully at her with bloodshot eyes. He could almost see her shudder. She glanced down at his attire, which was the same clothing he had been wearing for the last three days, and he could practically hear the rolling of her eyes back in their sockets when he turned his back to her to pour himself a cup of wine.

"So early for alcohol, my Thane?" She asked, and he shrugged, taking a deep sip of the red drink.

"You any good at sucking cock, Lydia?" He inquired thoughtfully and watched in calm amusement as the Nord's face turned bright red like a tomato.

It made her even more unattractive, which he didn't think was possible. However, she became utterly enraged at what the drunk had just said to her.

"H-how dare you!" She cried, stuttering, and her big rough hands balled up into fists. "You are the worst Thane I have ever had, you…you…asshole! Look at you, the mighty Dragonborn reduced to a set of rags and an alcoholic. You disgust me!"

He hadn't been prepared for that. Her words hit Malath like a stone brick to the gut. But unlike dear Lydia, Malath was better at hiding his emotions, and so he simply smiled at her.

"Lovely Lydia," He told her soothingly, holding his hands up. "I was joking, honest. I have more respect for you than that."

His voice was dripping with lies, but she was too stupid to be able to tell.

He watched with delight as Lydia's anger burned out after a few moments and was quickly replaced with shame. This time her pale face flushed red in embarrassment, and she tucked a strand of her lank brown hair behind her ear, stammering an apology.

"No need," Malath replied, waving his hand. "I have no need for you today, like every day you come here. You are dismissed."

His voice was flat. He was bored with her now. His fun was over, so Malath made her leave and turned back to his only hobby. His cup of wine was immensely inviting. The only sound of her departure was the clanging of her ridiculously bulky armor, and the door shutting quietly behind her.

However, the housecarl's words sunk into his ragged flesh, as he sat by himself in Breezehome, drinking the day away. Malath sighed, running a hand through his dirty brown mane of hair. His physique was no longer toned and perfectly sculpted or something to be desired. Where muscles once quivered hard and round, his body was now soft and thin, reduced to almost skin and bones. He couldn't remember the last time he saw his reflection, but he knew he didn't want to see what he looked like now. Malath had not uttered a shout in the Dragon tongue for years, nor picked up a sword in the past two years. What prized possessions he had lain in boxes, or on every spare surface in his home, collecting dust. He had been reduced to someone he didn't recognize anymore, and those depressing thoughts made him drink more. By the afternoon his mind was clouded over with alcohol, and that brought him false comfort. And, like always, by the early evening, he had finished off the all of the stale bread and more wine than he could remember. It was enough so when he laid down on the cold stone floor of his lonely home he swiftly fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Malath groaned and pried his sticky cheek off the cold wood floor. Rising up, he gulped like a terrible sea monster coming up for fresh air. He sure looked the part. The Orc had slept on the floor, which was normal behavior, and he proceeded to rise unsteadily to his feet. It was no easy task. His vision was blurry, and his eyes were caked with crust. His head felt five times its size and it was hard to keep still without wobbling like a newborn babe who doesn't know how to operate motion quite right. Malath leaned against the dresser and groaned again, dragging a hand across his haggard face, which had a lot of drool on one side; disgusted with himself.

 _Well if I have to be awake_ , he told himself,  _then it's time for some grub._

This was the highlight of his morning. Not the going outside part, but getting food. From the looks of things, you'd never know he ate like a king; for his moss green skin stretched tightly over his big bones, and most of his muscle mass had gradually reduced since his career ended. Malath used to be a beast of an Orsimer, as most of his kind was, but he used to be exceptionally amazing.

Malath stumbled around and wrenched open one of the dresser drawers, pulling out the first article of clothing his hands came across. He roughly pulled a pair of breeches on and a dirty blue tunic. He unsteadily descended the stairs and walked past the cold hearth, reaching his boots and cloak. Malath shoved the worn leather onto his feet and drew his hood up, making sure he looked a proper hermit, before heading out the door.

Sunlight assaulted his eyes, and he stood still for a moment; blinking rapidly, until his vision adjusted to the sudden change. Whiterun was bustling with activity, as the commoners went about their business for the day, and he did not greet anyone he passed as he made his way to the Plains district. Everything was the way it was each time Malath came here, and he liked it that way. He paid no attention to the other customers as he made his way over to a Bosmer for fresh meat. Malath haggled with Anoriath for a few minutes, before grudgingly agreeing to a price. A young woman stood to his right, eying some of the stalls, and as he shopped the Orc watched as she interacted with the elf. Her mages hood was pulled up so he could not see her face, but he knew she was not native to Whiterun. Malath gathered his packages and was beginning to continue his rounds when he saw out of the corner of his eyes a scene that filled him with instant anger.

He was not too hung-over to miss the filthy Bosmer as his grubby hand brushed over the girl's rump, roughly squeezing it, and neither did the girl.

"Hey!" There came a shout, and the girl spun around, confronting Anoriath with a well-placed fist to the jaw.

There was a thud, and Malath watched the attack unfold, his hands raised, but the Bosmer simply stumbled back and cried foul.

"Thief!" His voice rasped, clutching his stubbly cheek. "Stole from me, and then assaulted me!"

"What!" He roared, stepping forward, watching the girl as she backed away from the stall. He had completely forgotten that he was a quiet hermit the moment he'd witnessed the girl being violated.

Her hood had fallen back, revealing a young and beautiful elvish face. Her eyes widened in a mixture of shock and anger.

"Y-you bastard!" She cried out, but it was too late.

A few guards had heard Anoriath's cry and were making their way over to the plains district.

Malath didn't know what he was thinking, as he never intervened in anything. But something inside him gave a nudge. Anoriath was a dirty son of a bitch and the opportunity to fuck with him was too tempting. The mage didn't deserve to be arrested. Malath knew that Anoriath had an understanding with the guards, and they'd take his side first.

In a split second decision, Malath strode up the girl and took a hold of her arm, dragging her to him so he could speak in a hushed tone.

"Go now," He growled quietly, pointing to Breezehome. "I will come for you when I have cleared this up."

"What?" She replied, looking up at Malath with wide blue eyes.

"I saw what he did," He explained quickly, "but you're going to get arrested if you don't go!  _Now_!"

The elf didn't need to be told twice, and she quickly bolted, easily slipping into a small crowd of people who were making their way towards the market. Malath turned to face Anoriath, a scowl on his weathered face, and he quickly advanced; his face inches away from the cowering man.

"I saw what you did," He growled menacingly, thoroughly enjoying the fear he was instilling in the pathetic man. Anoriath gulped, visibly shaking.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll send them away."

Anoriath nodded once, and the Orc stepped away from him. He retrieved his packages and continued to the vegetable stand, determined to finish his purchases before heading back. The guards finally reached Anoriath, only to be sent away again with a nervous laugh and an apology. Once Malath was finished, he calmly walked back to Breezehome, and entered his home. He was greeted by a fire roaring in the hearth. The girl had removed her traveling cloak and hung it up beside the door. It was the first time since winter some months past that he had felt warmth inside Breezehome. She stood up when he entered.

"Thank you," she began, and Malath shrugged her off.

"He's a son of a bitch anyways," he replied, kicking off his shoes. "Saw him grab your ass. Then he had the gull to accuse you of stealing."

She blushed at the Orc's language, looking down at the floor, but smiled.

"I know who you are," she responded softly, and he ignored her; wandering over to the cupboards to put away the fresh food.

"Yeah?" he asked after a moment of silence.

He needed a cup of something strong. Malath rummaged around and found another goblet, so he set them both on the table.

"You're the Dragonborn." She whispered, and he stiffened.

" _Was_  the Dragonborn," came his guttural reply.

"Just because Alduin is long gone doesn't mean you stop being Dragonborn," the elf replied briskly, "You're a legend, Malath."

_Malath. That was my name._

"Do you have a name?" He asked, trying to change the subject.

Malath poured wine into the goblets and offered one to her. The elf gratefully accepted it.

"Lenia," she replied, smiling warmly at him.

Malath took a gulp of wine and nodded, studying her for a moment.

She was short, her head barely reaching the bottom of his chest, and she was a tiny woman. Malath watched Lenia as she moved closer, taking a seat at the bench beside him. Her brunette hair was cut just past her shoulders and formed a wavy mass around her young face. Her skin was a creamy tan color. He took another sip, looking away. It had been a long time since a beautiful woman was in his home, and he felt dirty as his thoughts drifted to unwanted places.

"There won't be any problem," Malath mumbled, referring back to the marketplace. "I took care of it."

"Thank you again," Lenia replied happily, turning her blue-eyed gaze on him. She smiled again, and before he knew it he was smiling back. It was contagious.

Lenia frowned, and he hastily wiped the smile from his face.

_Gods… do I look that bad? Probably._

"What?" He asked after a moment, unused to being stared at.

"You don't smile very often do you?" She asked, and he looked down at his cup.

"No…I don't do much of anything nowadays."

"You should smile more often," Lenia replied, and he couldn't deny that she was kind.

It turned his stomach into knots and too many feelings he had spent so long trying to suppress bubbled to the surface. He did not like it one bit.

_I need to distance myself._

Malath stood up, moving towards the fire, and turned his back to her, staring at the flames. They were silent for a little while; he could hear the quiet noise of her cup being set down on the wooden table with his still good hearing. After a while, there was a rustle, and he forced himself to turn around.

Lenia was sifting through the cupboards, humming to herself.

"What are you doing?" He asked, and the girl shot him a pleasant smile.

"Making a meal, of course. It's the least I can do."

"You don't have to—"

"Yes I do," She cut in, her voice firm.

Malath gave a defeated sigh and did not try to sway her. His stomach rumbled in response. He was really hungry.

_Interesting elf, I'm surprised she can stand to be in the same room as my deadbeat self._

Malath took a seat near the fire, enjoying the warmth that spread through his bone.

Lenia turned out to be a decent cook, and he grudgingly admitted to himself that he enjoyed her company, as they sat together at the bench in Breezehome. It was certainly a strange twist of events.

_I just wanted to buy some food._


	3. Chapter 3

Malath was an interesting fellow, and Lenia was amazed to be in the presence of the Dragonborn. She had only read about him in the newly written textbooks back in Winterhold. She knew everything about his accomplishments. He had saved Skyrim; and yet it looked as though his life was in shambles, as she watched the skinny Orsimer steadily drinking beside her on the bench. She took another sip of her wine. Drinking wasn't really her thing, but he had offered it and Lenia had welcomed a little alcohol after the incident with the merchant. This was her first time travelling completely alone since she had left for college, and the encounter had unnerved her.

His house, which Malath called Breezehome, was in a state of disarray. Lenia had judged by the clutter, dust, and overall untidiness of the place that he must not have a wife, and that thought made her sad.

_How could the most famous man in Skyrim be in such despair?_

"Do you live alone?" Lenia inquired quietly, absently twirling a strand of her hair around one finger.

She glanced over at him. Malath looked a little worse for wear, but she could see hints of his former self.

_I know he looked like a God back in the day._

But this Malath was thin. Dangerously thin in her opinion. She made sure he ate plenty of the venison and potatoes that had been fried up. Lenia had also managed to make the stubborn man drink some water, he was too fond of his alcohol.

"There's more to life than ale," she had joked in conversation.

"Maybe," Malath replied, his voice deep and gravelly. She enjoyed the sound.

Lenia watched as Malath poured himself more wine, now a little sloppier. He became more intoxicated throughout the day. A little bit of wine slopped over the edge of his goblet, the crimson liquid spilling down the side and pooling on the table. He yawned, and she took a moment to study the Orsimer while he was unaware. She had realized her staring made him uncomfortable earlier.

His skin was the colour of an evergreen, but there was something dusky about it. She imagined he was in his early thirties, but Malath's current health probably added a few more years on his face than usual. He had dark bags under his eyes, and also appeared to have a permanent scowl, which she knew could be softened with a smile. One of his tusks had been broken off, and only a sliver of the white bone showed, while the other was still intact. He had long brown hair streaked with a few gray strands, which had been messily tied back. Multiple scars adorned his skin, some darker than others, and she was sure he had a tale to go with every one of them. It looked like he hadn't bathed in a while and could probably benefit from a haircut.

Malath looked up, fixing his sad looking gaze on her, and Lenia hastily looked away, feeling herself blush. If they weren't so bloodshot and tired looking, she'd say they were a very pretty shade of green.

Malath coughed, and she looked back up, watching the Orsimer as he frowned and gently rubbed his chest.

"Are you sick?" Lenia asked, and the Orsimer shrugged.

"Haven't been the same since I killed Alduin." He replied, "That sort of work takes a toll on a man's body, and spirit."

She nodded in agreement, knowing Malath had revealed a lot more to her than he probably intended. He was depressed, that much she knew, but there were a lot of issues that could be fixed with a little love and effort. She smiled to herself and stood up from the bench; thoughts whirling. Lenia wandered around the room, which was quite tiny, but spacious enough for one Orc. She inspected a few of the crates while Malath continued to drink, unaware of her snooping. What she found inside completely surprised her, as there was an abundance of beautiful artifacts. She gasped, gently lifting up the scabbard of an ebony sword. She ran hands over the intricate designs with wide eyes.

"What are you doing?" Malath asked, slowly turning around to face the elf.

"Are  _all_  these crates filled with precious artifacts and weapons?" Lenia asked; her voice filled with awe.

"Yeah," Malath replied, "collected everything back in the day."

"Did you ever…find any staffs, in your travels?" She responded, sounding hopeful.

_I'm always on the lookout for a good staff._

Malath frowned, but nodded.

"They're upstairs, in the spare room. I never used them, but figured they're worth something. I never got around to selling any."

"Oh wow!" Lenia exclaimed. "May I please see them?" She pleaded, placing the ebony sword back where she had found it.

Malath nodded. He leaned back and rested his elbow on the table, chuckling at her when she gave a loud whoop and rushed upstairs to see them.

Lenia heard a knock at the door. She stopped and turned back towards the lower floor. The elf peered down at Malath, who continued to drink, and glanced back at the door.

"Did you hear a knock?" She called down, and Malath placed his goblet down.

"Yeah, it's my damn housecarl." He growled. "Go on, look at the staffs, she'll be gone in a minute."

She consented, continuing into the second bedroom, which was small and filled to the brim with staffs. Her mouth hung open as she stared, incredulous, at the massive collection the Orsimer had.

He must have encountered a lot of mages, she thought to herself, feeling a small sense of unease as she picked one up. But they probably would have killed him if he didn't get them first so...

Without another thought, she dove into the sea of magical weapons with enthusiasm.

Lenia had picked up a staff of fire, one of many by the looks of things, when she heard Malath's raised voice.

"How many time must I insult you before you leave me alone, woman?" He exclaimed angrily, and the tinkling of glass bottles being handled roughly echoed upstairs.

He was rifling through the cupboard for more alcohol.

"But my Thane, "came a woman's urgent reply, "I am sworn to protect and serve you, I take my job very seriously."

"Too seriously. I have not required you for  _years_ , Lydia!"

Lydia opened her mouth to say something but was cut off.

"Look around!" Malath continued, his voice rising in volume, and Lenia gently laid the staff she held down on the others.

She moved towards the doorway, peering out. A female Nord stood by the fire, her ironclad arms crossed. She had a look of pent up frustration on her face. Lenia frowned, continuing to eavesdrop, and it wasn't hard, The Orc had a good set of lungs.

"I am a drunk and a deadbeat, you stupid cow," Malath yelled.

Lenia could not see him, for he was out of view, but she could hear the Orc as he slammed his fists down on the table.

"I insult you every time you come here, and yet you still come back to me. I hate you Lydia, and I know damn well the feeling is mutual, so do us both a favor and leave me the fuck alone!"

Lydia blinked, frowning, and did not reply for a moment. The flames from the cooking pit cast long shadows along her armor.

"Unless you  _are_  here to suck my cock, dear Lydia, You are truly useless to me."

Lenia grimaced, watching Lydia as she turned around and left Breezehome without another word. She was kind of shocked at Malath's outburst. He sure had a temper, but she understood it was not without reason. His behavior was still rude. She waited a few minutes before walking down the stairs to face Malath. He sat by the fire with a bottle of mead in his hand and did not notice her at first.

"Fuck," He murmured, glancing over at her, and he looked away when he saw the frown on her face.

"That was a little harsh," Lenia whispered, and Malath sighed.

"I'm sorry," he choked out, sighing.

"You're not sorry you said it, but you're sorry I heard you talking so horribly to your Housecarl."

Malath frowned.

"I guess," he growled, scowling at the fire, and he took another swig of mead.

"You're not a deadbeat." She continued.

"What?"

"You're an alcoholic, that much is true." Lenia took the other chair and dragged it near him, sitting down. "But you're not a deadbeat."

"Oh yeah? What do you call this then," he spat, gesturing to the messy home, and then to himself.

"After Alduin was slain, there was nothing left for you," Lenia speculated, staring at her hands. "But people haven't forgotten, you'll always be remembered. I read every book on your accomplishments when I first joined the college, you're a hero."

"I was a hero, now I am nobody."

"No!"

Lenia reached forward and grabbed his scarred hand and held it firmly with her own. Her skin was the softest thing he'd felt in a long time. The gesture shocked Malath, and his eyes widened.

"That is not true," Lenia insisted. "Your name is recorded in History, and that will never go away."

" _Stop_ ," Malath replied.

His voice cracked, and he quickly wrenched his hand back, rising hastily to his feet. He retreated to the bench and plopped himself down, turning his back to the elf he barely knew.

"You don't know me," He growled, and then the Orc was silent.

Lenia sat by the fire; her hands clasped tightly in her lap and she tried to come up with a way to bring back the fires in the Dragonborn's life.

 _He just needs a little nudge,_  she told herself, glancing over at his dark form from time to time.

_There's a broken man inside that tough shell._


	4. Chapter 4

Malath couldn't stay mad at the girl for very long, and to be honest, he wasn't truly mad, to begin with. Lenia had said some things that made him think about his life. But that was dangerous thinking. So, he did what he does best, and tried to drown his thoughts in a drink. However, this time he found himself hesitant to go too far because the girl still sat quietly by the fireside, her hands clasped in her lap. She didn't say a word for quite some time. Suddenly drinking wasn't as desirable. Eventually, his grumpiness ebbed away, and he was left feeling ashamed for how rudely he had acted.

_How could a woman I barely know have such a profound effect on me?_

It was baffling. These changes were happening all too rapidly, and he didn't even feel like being drunk anymore. Malath watched Lenia for a while, noting how the firelight made her hair and skin glow. More dangerous thinking. He let out a long sigh.

Some time passed, although the Orc never paid attention to time so he didn't know how much time had passed when Lenia finally moved. She rose to her feet and stretched her arms above her head. Malath watched her, and then hastily looked at the wall when she turned his way. He didn't know what to say to her now. Then he heard her move the chair back to its place.

"I guess I should leave."

Her soft voice floated over to him, and he turned to her. Lenia smoothed down the front of her blue mage's robes, stepping a little closer.

"Where are you from?" Malath asked, ignoring her comment.

Lenia blinked, and then moved to the bench and sat down beside him. He shifted his body so he was facing her and peered down at the girl.

_Gods, she's so short... but it suits her._

"Solitude," Lenia replied, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind her pointed ear, and Malath gulped down a mouthful of mead.

"And you're a battle mage," he commented, to which Lenia laughed.

"I wish!" she chuckled, "but no…I am just an apprentice."

"What brought you to Whiterun?"

Lenia sighed, and smiled softly, a distant look in her eyes.

"I went home to visit my parents. It had been a few months since I left for Winterhold, and they were wishing to see me again. I am on my way back to the college and decided to stop and re-supply here."

"Have you been to Whiterun before?"

"A few times, briefly."

"So," Malath ventured, getting to the point of his questions. "You will go to an Inn."

"Well that was the plan," Lenia replied, eying him with a curious gaze.

"You know there's a bed underneath all those staffs," he replied slowly, and the girl's face lit up.

"There's no point in wasting your money on a room up the way when I have a spare bedroom." He continued, coughing, and Lenia grinned.

"I don't wish to impose or anything…" She replied cheekily, and the Orc snorted.

"Impose on what?" he growled, rolling his eyes, and Lenia laughed.

"Thank you Malath, I appreciate it."

"If you clean up the staffs, you can keep as many as you can carry."

Lenia practically burst out of her skin. She was truly ecstatic. He hadn't seen enthusiasm like that in a long time. It almost made him feel wistful. Almost.

"There must be something more I can do…" she replied thoughtfully, rubbing her chin.

"Well…"

Lenia glanced over at him, and Malath patted his stomach

"When's dinner?"

Lenia grinned.

"I make the best lamb stew."

* * *

By the time Lenia had finished cleaning up the staffs into as neat of a pile as she could manage, she was ready to crash. The bed she had uncovered was small but soft, and relatively lacking with dust.

_I guess the staffs helped with that._

After dinner, Malath had continued his nightly ritual of drinking while Lenia headed upstairs to clean. She had taken the liberty of cleaning a little more than just the spare room. Many beautiful weapons decorated his bedroom walls, and she was temporarily distracted with them, admiring the craftsmanship. He truly had an incredible collection of things.

Her pack lay slumped on the floor beside her feet, and she laid back on the bed for a little while, weary from her travels. Although today had taken an amazing turn. She'd met the Dragonborn, something she had longed to do since she was younger and the tales were just beginning to come true.

She must have fallen asleep, for Lenia woke with a little jolt, and her back was aching from lying in such an uncomfortable position. Her feet were still placed on the floor and her legs felt numb. She stood up and stretched, hearing a satisfying crack; and then shuffled out of the room and down the small staircase to the lower floor of Breezehome.

The fire had died down, and Malath had fallen asleep in the most awkward of positions on the bench. His back was bent uncomfortably, and his neck arched at an odd angle. His head lay slumped on the table. Lenia knew he'd feel the pain in the morning if she didn't get him to his bed.

She quickly reached the table and firstly cleared up their dishes. She retrieved Malath's goblet, which had fallen on the floor. Lenia cleaned up the spilled mead and then turned to Malath, smiling to herself, for his snores were ridiculously loud. His chest rose and fell with each breath, and it looked as though he had succeeded in dirtying his tunic even more; if that were even possible.

As she watched him sleep, she couldn't help but feel sorry for the Orsimer. He had put his entire soul into saving Skyrim, and when it was saved he lost himself.

 _Nobody was there for him_ , she thought sadly.  _To keep him feeling valued._

Lenia sighed and moved forward. She was hesitant to try and wake a drunken Orc, but he really did need a softer place to sleep. His health was poor enough as it was.

"Malath," she whispered, gently touching his shoulder.

He continued to snore, and she shook his shoulder slightly.

"Malath," she called louder.

He grunted and pushed her arm away.

"Come on dear, time for bed," She called softly.

"Bugger off."

"Watch your mouth," Lenia scolded.

She knew she'd have to practically drag him upstairs. She knelt down, hoisting his arm around her shoulders. For a skinny Orc, he still weighed a ton, and his arm alone dwarfed her small frame. She tugged, and Malath growled.

"Don't you _dare_  make my tiny self drag your ass upstairs," she hissed in his ear.

That seemed to get a reaction, and Malath half complied. The pair both rose unsteadily to their feet; Malath leaning most of his body weight on the girl and his eyes were half closed. They shuffled painfully slow to the staircase.

Getting up the stairs was a whole other matter. They nearly climbed on all fours, and there was a lot of protesting and growling from the sleepy Malath. At some point, he wanted to lie down and she swore if she had let him he would have slept right there on the staircase. Lenia could just imagine the repercussions of that decision the next morning.

They finally reached the top. Lenia felt like she had climbed a mountain. Her chest was heaved from the physical labor, and strands of hair clung to her sweaty forehead.

_Perhaps I should have let him be, but I am too close to the finish line now._

They reached the bedroom, and she intended to gently ease Malath down. But she lost her grip and he landed on the mattress quite heavily, not that it bothered him one bit. His eyes were closed, and Lenia smiled at her accomplishment, whispering goodnight. Lenia turned to leave when he called out

"Don't leave me."

His voice was quite unlike him. There was desperateness in his tone that made her chest hurt.

"Stay," he whispered hoarsely, and she couldn't say no.

"I'm here Malath," Lenia whispered, sitting down on the bed beside him.

She didn't know if he was aware of what he was saying, or if the Orc was half dreaming. She stayed there anyway, until she was positive he was asleep; and softly stroked his hair while humming a little song her mum used to sing to her. Once he was back to snoring obnoxiously loud, Lenia quietly made her way back to the spare bedroom.

She lay down on the bed and pulled the covers around her, blowing out the candle that she had lit earlier in the evening. Her decision had been made; she needed to save the Dragonborn.


	5. Chapter 5

His head was pounding, as it usually did after a night of drinking, and the Orc groaned. Malath tensed for a moment. Somehow, he was laying in his own bed.

_Right…that stubborn Elf dragged my sorry ass up here last night._

He sighed and rubbed his aching eyes.

 _How could she be so kind?_  He asked himself a few times, feeling confused.

He could have been terribly angry when she woke him up, He could have been violent. Malath was pretty brutal to Lydia when she would try to wake him in the past.

Malath shuddered, and pulled himself into a sitting position, swaying slightly as the room suddenly spun way too fast. After a moment, his vision settled. He sniffed the air. A delicious smell had wafted into his room. His ears detected the sizzling of something being cooked in the single frying pan he owned. So, Lenia had stuck around.

The Orc clambered awkwardly to his feet and fumbled through a satchel for a health potion. Drinking it helped ease the pain in his temple immensely. Malath took his time to dress today, thoroughly searching in the drawers for the cleanest clothes he could muster; mumbling about the fact that he really did need to do the laundry. He opened the second drawer and to his complete surprise, found two neatly folded piles of clean tunics and pants.

Malath blinked, glancing around the room. He noticed for the first time just how much cleaner his bedroom was.

"That little sneak," he growled softly, baffled by her actions. "She's not my housekeeper."

"Malath?"

Lenia's voice called out to him from downstairs. Malath walked out into the landing and looked down at the girl.

"Good morning!" The elf exclaimed cheerfully. "I thought I heard you blundering around."

"Funny," He replied sarcastically, gripping the banister, and Lenia grinned.

"I was going to wait until you were up to fetch you water for a bath, are you ready for it?"

"You …you don't have to…" Malath muttered, and Lenia cocked her head to one side.

"I'm going to take that as a yes. I'll be up in a moment."

He sighed and returned to his bedroom. Malath sat down heavily on the bed and waited for the silly elf. Lenia appeared a couple of minutes later with a large pot of water, and she walked over to the disturbingly misused tub located in one corner of the room.

She poured the water in, and then lifted her hand, letting a spell of fire heat the water. Malath cringed. Magic was not his thing.

"Breakfast will be ready when you come downstairs," Lenia told him.

She picked up the pot and walked towards the doors.

"Why are you so nice?" He blurted without thinking, and then hastily closed his mouth.

Lenia turned around to look at him with a smile on her face.

 _Does she ever look unhappy? Well... she sure was mad when she punched the merchant_ , Malath remembered with an inward chuckle.

"Why not? I like you," she replied smoothly and then left the room before he could even begin to think up a reply.

He felt his face grow warm and Malath busied himself with dealing with a bath to take his mind off of things.

He stripped his filthy clothes off and placed a hesitant foot in the tub, surprised at how perfect the temperature of the water was. Steam floated around his calf, and he quickly climbed in, sinking into the warm liquid with a contented growl. It wasn't too bad. He admitted it made his sore bones feel a lot better after. He took the bar of soap Lenia had left on the edge of the tub and dragged it along his green skin. He was amazed and disgusted at how murky the water became. He didn't even know he owned soap.

 _I'm disgusting_ , Malath thought with a curl of his lip and stood up.

He shivered, feeling the droplets of water cool on his skin. He dried himself off while walking back over to the dresser. Malath picked up a tunic and shoved it over his head. He fumbled with the lace strings of his pants; frustrated that he couldn't function as efficiently as he wished. He knew it was his own doing but annoyed him nonetheless. He smoothed his hair back, suddenly felt curious about what he looked like. Malath retrieved the only mirror he had, a little hand-held thing made of silver he had brought back from his travels and he took a deep breath.

_Do I really want to know?_

The answer was yes.

Malath wasn't as shocked as he was expecting it to be. The Orsimer that stared back at him was not the ugliest brute in the world. Sure, his eyes were bloodshot, that was a given with the nature of his hobby. He had dark bags under his eyes, and several light scars were scattered across his face. His beard was dark and thicker than he imagined. Malath scowled at what remained of his one tusk, and quickly placed the mirror back down. That story was a sore spot, and he did not wish to think about it.

_Gods, I need a haircut._

Malath hoped he hadn't been making Lenia wait too long. He gathered his wits and quickly left the bedroom. He wandered noisily down the stairs into the first level of Breezehome. The warmth of a happily crackling fire greeted him, and the smell of food bombarded his senses.

"I thought you had drowned," came Lenia's ever-cheerful voice, and she appeared from the other room with a handful of soul gems.

"You're just full of jokes this morning," Malath replied, and Lenia laughed.

"I hope you don't mind…" Lenia held a few of the gems up to show what she had found. "I don't think you're the soul gem type."

"They're yours."

Malath turned to the bench and sat down, eager to begin his meal, which turned out to be quite good. The Orc praised her cooking. He took a big drink of what he thought was wine, only to find it was water.

"Yuck," Malath complained, and Lenia rolled her eyes at him.

"Water is good for you, silly."

"Wine tastes better."

Lenia frowned, and he turned back to his food, feeling a little awkward.

"How old are you?" Malath asked after a few moments of silence.

He had been curious to know for a while, but it slipped his mind.

"Twenty-five winters, and you're twenty-eight if I'm not mistaken."

Malath blinked, staring at her with narrowed eyes.

"The textbook told me your age when you defeated Alduin, I did the math." She explained between mouthfuls. "You were so young when you first learned the voice."

"Oh."

"I wish I had brought one with me, I own all three volumes. They're wonderful accounts."

Malath shrugged, taking a bite of his fried eggs.

"What are your plans for today?"

"Well," Lenia turned towards him, her eyes sparkling mischievously.

He looked back at her with suspicion.

"Will you accompany me on my errands?" She asked.

"Why do you want me to go?"

"Because, you know Whiterun, and of course because I enjoy your company."

Malath pondered it, wondering if she were up to something a little more than just wanting his company. She stared back, her blue eyes betraying nothing. Malath took another sip of water, grimacing.

"Okay," he replied, surprised by his response.

"Excellent!"

_What did I get myself into?_

* * *

Lenia nearly had to fist fight the big green baby to ditch the creepy wraith cloak he was so fond of. It was a tattered gray rag and made him appear like a beggar.

"That's the way I like it," Malath had argued, "Nobody bothers me."

"That's just silly," Lenia replied, forcefully removing it from his grasp. The Orsimer scowled.

"Don't look at me like that," She scolded.

In the end, the elf won, and Malath left the house looking like a decent Orc. He sported a slightly faded black cloak that had no hood to hide under and zero tattered holes. The pair departed Breezehome and walked up the hill to Arcadia's Cauldron. He wouldn't let up the scowl.

"You could at least  _pretend_  to enjoy my company," Lenia complained to him, before opening the door to the shop.

Lenia busied herself with haggling Arcadia. She needed the proper vials of potions she would use for the rest of her trip as well as few ingredients. She enjoyed dabbling with alchemy here and there when she had the time. Malath stood near the door, watching the elf while she interacted with Arcadia. He was surprisingly a gentleman, coming over to hold the packages once she had finished paying.

"Thank you," Lenia murmured, ignoring the odd glance Arcadia shot them.

Arcadia sent the Orc an even more curious glance. Lenia wondered if she even knew who he was.

They left the store, and continued to a few more places, detouring a trip home to drop off their items. Malath made to remove his shoes when Lenia told him her next errand.

"I wish to speak with Farengar Secret-Fire, the Jarl's wizard," Lenia explained, moving back to the door. "You can come along if you wish, but I know you don't like magic."

Malath paused, looking up at her, and she smiled.

"Okay," he replied, nodding. "I'll stay here."

Lenia left Breezehome and headed up the street towards Dragonsreach. It was a place she had never been to before. She climbed the winding stone staircase up to the Jarl's place, greeting the guard standing outside the doors. When she headed inside it took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the darker atmosphere. In the middle of the room, a fire roared. Lenia found Farengar in a little side room to the right of the dining hall, pouring over a couple of spell tomes.

He was a formidable fellow. Lenia couldn't say he was the kindest mage she had ever met, but he listened to her and had much to offer.

"Conjure flame atronach," he mumbled, and Lenia nodded.

"Yes, I think I am ready to learn it, do you have a copy of the tome for purchase?"

"I think so, just a moment."

The mage disappeared into another, smaller room, and Lenia waited patiently by the table. He returned a minute later with a book in his hand, and she rocked on the balls of my feet with excitement.

"Here it is."

The wizard offered a heavy spell tome to her.

"Oh, that's so wonderful!" Lenia replied happily, taking the book from his outstretched hands. She gently cradled it in her two hands, it was quite heavy. She could feel the low humming of magic that vibrated through it, tingling with excitement and anticipation.

"How much?"

"Ninety-nine gold."

"Done."

 _Today went incredibly well,_  she told herself once she was heading back towards Breezehome.

It was beginning to grow dark, and Lenia realized she'd taken a lot longer up in Dragonsreach than she'd originally intended. But she was pleased with herself.

_Malath became a little more like an Orsimer and less like a zombie, and I got all my supplies._

She had been thinking all day of how she was going to convince the stubborn man to go with her to Winterhold. He needed to get outside the walls of Whiterun and find the spark again. She knew it wasn't going to be easy, but she had to try anyway. Lenia couldn't let the Dragonborn waste away.

Lenia became a little nervous the closer she reached him because she had to tell Malath soon. She knew she'd have an argument on her hands.

 _Perhaps the element of surprise might work_ , she mulled.  _Just throw it out there and then fight until I win._

Lenia sighed, stopping just outside the door. Outside the sun was beginning to fade into the night. She had spent more time up at Dragonsreach than she had intended. It was now or never.

She stepped inside, finding the Orsimer was out of sight.

"Malath?" Lenia called out, and she heard a muffled response from upstairs. A female voice giggled.

Her stomach dropped. Was he with a woman?

Malath appeared a moment later, his bare chest heaving, and the laces to his breeches undone. Lenia swallowed hard, feeling her face grow red.

"I-it's a bad time…." Lenia whispered, and then Arcadia stumbled out from the room.

"Whoops!" Arcadia laughed.

She sounded drunk. The giggling woman attempted to adjust her skirt but wasn't terribly successful.

"I'll be leaving now."

Arcadia moved unsteadily down the staircase and walked past Lenia without another word. The door closed behind her and there was dead silence in the room.

"I thought…I thought you'd be a bit longer," Malath blabbered, looking very uncomfortable and embarrassed.

Lenia didn't know what to think, so she shrugged it off.

"It's okay, I'm an intrusion anyway," she replied quietly, moving over to the bench.

Malath opened up his mouth to speak changed his mind. He remained quiet. He was extremely embarrassed but so was the elf.

Lenia placed the bottle of wine she had purchased for two of them to have with dinner on the wooden table and started to climb the stairs. Malath moved back into the bedroom. A few moments later he came out completely dressed and watched Lenia as she placed the spell tome down on the bed.

"What's that?" He asked, still sounding a little embarrassed, and he coughed.

"Oh uh, just a spell tome for conjuration."

"Is that what you do?"

"I have knowledge in a lot of areas, but conjuration is my primary interest," Lenia replied quietly, turning to him.

"So, you like…conjure things to fight for you," he stated, and Lenia nodded.

"Pretty much."

There was an awkward silence. Neither of them knew what to say.

"So... I'll start dinner."

Lenia brushed past Malath and climbed the stairs back down to the first floor. She began pulling ingredients out of the cupboard. Malath eventually joined her. He moved over to the bench and picked up the bottle of wine.

"Vintage… this is expensive wine."

Lenia had her back to him, and she rolled her eyes. This was not how she thought it was going to go.

"I bought it for us to have with dinner," Lenia explained.

She started to chop up carrots, and Malath sat down, watching her while she prepped the food. Lenia couldn't get the image of Arcadia, laughing and breathless as she came out of his bedroom, out of her mind.

_Now or never._

"Malath," Lenia started, placing the knife down. The Orsimer looked up at her, and she took a deep breath.

"I think you should come to Winterhold with me."


	6. Chapter 6

Did he hear her right?

_Go to Winterhold… specifically to the college of mages. No way in oblivion._

This girl was nuts if she thought he'd go near that place again. He had spent far more time there than he ever wanted to.

"No," Malath croaked, turning back to his drink.

He stared at the murky liquid, his heart thudding against his ribcage. Something inside of him stirred and the feeling nearly paralyzed him with fear.

Lenia was silent for a few moments while she gathered the carrots and flung them into a pot. Then she moved over to the fire pit and was busy for a few minutes. Eventually, she turned back to him, a frown on her face.

"I can't leave you here like this," she argued quietly, turning back around.

She crossed her arms and stared at the Orc.

"Don't you want to do something with the rest of your life?"

"No," Malath repeated, his breathing becoming unsteady. They were charting dangerous territory.

"I know there's still an adventurer inside of you," Lenia continued, her voice soft and comforting.

The Orc scowled at his wine cup and tried to ignore her, although it was terribly hard not to listen. Something was threatening to burst. Something made him listen to the elf's words but he struggled against it.

"Let me take you outside these walls and show you that there is something worth living for," She pleaded, stepping closer.

Malath growled quietly, a whirlwind of emotions crashed against him and he felt like a boiling pot. Sitting there on the bench with a cup clenched tightly in his fist, his emotions were threatening to lose control. He wasn't nearly drunk enough for this sort of a conversation.

"Stop it," Malath mumbled, wishing to stop going down a fantasy road.

He stood up and made to escape to the bedroom when Lenia moved faster than he could in his worn-out state. She pinned him between the bench and the wall. She was surprisingly strong and Malath swallowed hard, feeling a lump rise painfully in his throat.

"I knew this was going to be hard."

Her hand firmly gripping his arm, and she smiled sadly at him. Malath felt his throat constrict, and he swallowed hard, looking away from her.

"You're the Dragonborn," she whispered thickly, her voice filled with such emotion that it made his chest ache. "That will never go away. You saved this country."

Dragonborn.

"I'm just an Orsimer," He spat back, careful not to say too much lest his voice betrayed his real feelings.

Malath tried to push her away. Lenia was stronger than he thought, and she held him there, her beautiful blue orbs piercing into him.

"I wouldn't be here without you, none of us would. Because of  _you_ , Malath, we are alive and well."

He scowled, clenching his fists, and looked down.

"Big deal."

"Where is your pride," she continued sharply, her voice taking an edge to it.

Malath glanced up, seeing the tears that welled in her eyes but her jaw was firmly set.

"You are an Orsimer, there is no prouder race than you. What kind of life is this?"

Malath's arm twitched. For a moment he almost forgot who was speaking to him. She had struck a nerve. He had no ties to his race, not after what his former family had done.

"What are you going to do?" She asked, her voice even and calm. "Are you going to hit me?"

Malath let out a deep breath and bowed his head in shame. He had almost wanted to hit the woman who was trying to help him.

_Why can't I live anymore? What is wrong with me?_

His internal voice screamed at him. A floodgate of thoughts pounding into his head. He couldn't shut them out, and he groaned.

_You're a drunken mess, day after day. What happened to glory and a good adventure? What happened to the Orc I used to be?_

_I should have been stronger than this, I should have found a way to keep busy and continue the lifestyle my soul yearns for. Became a mercenary…or a….a..._

He couldn't take it anymore. Malath sunk down onto the bench and covered his face with both hands.

"Malath," Lenia murmured, kneeling down beside him. She moved to grasp his hand.

"No! Malath startled and pushed her back.

The elf fell onto her rump and he ignored her, moving unsteadily to his feet. His whole body was shaking. He made his way for the stairs.

"You can live again!" Lenia cried, and she quickly blocked his way.

Before he could move her, Lenia jerked the Orc's arm forward and pulled him into a tight hug. Her arms wrapped firmly around his shoulders and his head tucked perfectly into the crook of her neck. Her touch completely dissolved his willpower, and Malath froze, unable to break free.

"I-I…"

"Let me help you," she whispered, and he felt her hot tears on his neck.

She held Malath tighter, her soft hair brushing against his skin. He felt something wet on his cheeks. He was crying.

A sob escaped his lips and he crushed Lenia to his chest; burying his face against her, and he cried for the first time in many years. Malath cried because he felt the pain he had been refusing to acknowledge, and he cried because he felt helpless to change it. This stranger, an Elf he'd only just met, had broken down a wall he spent five years building. There was no going back.

_I can't even remember the last time somebody held me in their arms._

"I want to feel alive again," Malath gasped, choking on his tears.

Lenia's shoulders shook as she cried with him, clutching onto his shirt. They stood there for what seemed like hours. The fire crackled behind them, warming his back, but it was Lenia who had wrapped him in her warm embrace.

_How can a stranger be so compassionate?_

Eventually, the girl pulled back, hesitantly so, and lifted his chin up. This time he met her blue eyes and allowed her to gently brush his cheeks with her thumb. Malath closed his eyes and leaned into her touch.

"Come on," Lenia whispered, "We need our rest. Tomorrow is a big day."

Malath's brows creased, and his heart skipped a beat. Was he really going to Winterhold with her? But even as he asked himself that question he knew the answer was yes. He nodded, and she took his hand, leading him up to the second floor.

"Stay with me tonight. I don't think I can be alone."

"Of course," came Lenia's reply, without hesitation.

Malath was vulnerable. She had opened up a lot of old wounds.

Lenia led him into the bedroom and pulled the covers back, watching as the Orsimer climbed into bed sunk down into the covers with a tired sigh. His face was tear streaked and he looked worn out, but she felt her heart swell at the incredible breakthrough he had.

Lenia walked around to the other side of the bed and climbed in, unsure of what to do with herself. She didn't have to figure it out, for once she had tucked the covers around her, Malath moved closer. She instinctively reached her arms out for him.

He lay on his side and wrapped his arm around his waist, burying his face in the crook of her neck. Lenia wrapped her arms around him and held him close, feeling his breath tickle her skin.

"In case you were wondering," Malath murmured sleepily, "Arcadia and I didn't do anything."

"Oh?" Lenia inquired, a ripple of relief coursing through her. She wasn't sure why.

"She could talk your ears off," he mumbled, and his body relaxed as he began to fall asleep. Lenia couldn't suppress a small smile.

Exhausted, they were both asleep in a matter of minutes.


	7. Chapter 7

Malath could feel the rise and fall of her chest with each breath, and she snored ever so softly. It was pretty adorable; and he lay there for quite some time after he had woken up, reveling in the feeling of her arms wrapped around him. He felt like a coddled child, and it felt good. Last night, when he thought about it, made him shiver at how exposed Lenia had made him feel. Malath had almost been crushed by his own thoughts alone, something he used to drown out with booze every night. There had not been a lot of talking, but she didn't need to use her words to convince him to leave Whiterun. No, her touch alone was what woke him up.

His arm had fallen asleep, and after a while, it became too unbearable, so Malath rolled onto his back and yawned. He listened as Lenia shifted beside him. When he glanced over she was laying her side now; facing him, her eyes still closed and fast asleep. He quietly sat up and placed his feet down on the chilly floorboards, scratching his chin. Malath stretched, and then rose to his feet, feeling less groggy than he ever had in a long time. It wasn't as large of a chore to find his dresser. He checked to make sure she was still asleep. He surprised himself as a smile rose to his lips while he watched her sleeping form. She looked so peaceful, so innocent. He wondered how such a dumb Orc like him had been blessed by such a good person as Lenia.

Malath slipped his rumpled tunic over his head and shoved the clean one on, following the same manner with his breeches. He realized with a small jolt of excitement and nervousness that he'd need to dig out some armor if he was indeed expected to travel. If this was not some elaborate dream that his cracked mind had conjured up. He'd have really lost it if that were the case.

"Malath?"

Her voice brought him back to the present, and Malath turned to her. She yawned, stretching her arms above her head and smiled sleepily at him. It was too much, and even he had to admit it made his stomach twist into knots.

Lenia pushed the covers back and climbed out from the bed, padding over to him. Malath stood still, unsure of what she was doing, and then the elf reached up and pulled him into a big hug.

"Did you sleep well?" Lenia asked as he returned the gesture. He still wasn't used to it.

"Yeah," he replied gruffly, coughing.

He didn't like how she made him feel so emotional. However, it was hard not to laugh at the state of her curly hair, which stuck up in all directions around her face. He scowled when she turned her back to him and retrieved her discarded shoes. He almost called her cute.

_I am an Orsimer. I do not think things are cute._

Lenia patted down her hair as she continued her way down to the first floor. He could hear her rustling through the cupboard. Malath's stomach growled. They hadn't eaten dinner the night before. After a moment he joined her downstairs and poured himself a cup of water. He was forcing himself to start the day on a good foot, for Lenia's sake. Malath looked up to find her staring at him, one thin eyebrow raised.

"What?" He blurted out.

"You know that's water, right?"

Malath let out a huff, and Lenia laughed.

"Shove it," he replied gruffly, gulping down the tasteless drink. It did feel good on his dry throat.

Malath wandered over to the fire pit and glanced down at the blackened mess of what was supposed to be last night's dinner, chucking to himself.

"What's so funny? Oh."

Lenia sighed and picked up the pot, moving back towards the barrel that held water, and scooped a few cups into the charred cookware.

"Just leave it," Malath told her, walking over to the elf. He took the pot from her hands and placed it down on a shelf.

"We'll get a new one."

"Are you sure?" Lenia replied quietly.

She seemed upset that she had ruined a pot. It was silly.

"O-of course, it's not a big deal. I am not a poor man if you haven't noticed."

He replied more gruffly than he had intended, slightly thrown off by her reaction. But Lenia's expression lightened considerably after a few minutes, and she was well on her way to frying up eggs for the two of them. Malath poured himself another drink and did some thinking.

I'll be traveling with a small elf to the College of Winterhold.

He frowned, watching Lenia as she cooked. He did vow he'd never go back to that place, and he was surprised he was able to tolerate being around Lenia knowing she was a mage. Malath had to wonder what she wanted him to do.

"Lenia," he called out, and the girl glanced over.

"What exactly do are you asking of me?" Malath inquired.

Lenia was silent for a moment while she brought over their breakfast and dished it out onto two worn silver plates.

"Well, I know you don't like magic…" Lenia started, sighing at his darkened expression. "I know you've been there before, Urag told me you've been to him in the college when you were searching for an Elder Scroll."

She sure knew a lot about his career. The Orc was silent, waiting for her to finish.

"We have nothing but respect for you, and since you obviously performed the necessary test to gain entrance, to begin with. I figured you could just join me in my assignments."

Malath mulled over what she had said, remembering the only time he had cast a spell. It had been a weak spell, just a small fireball, but he had no choice at the time. He was running out of options and was desperate for answers. That was the one and only time he had used magic.

"What are your tasks?" He asked quietly, and Lenia smiled.

"I don't know what the future holds, or if it will be stand up to the great task of entertaining the legendary Dragonborn. But for starters, I have to travel to Saarthal and meet the other apprentices there for an excavation."

"So, we're not actually going to the College first," Malath replied, feeling a little hopeful.

It's not the first place he'd like to go to after stepping outside Whiterun for the first time in over three years. That sure was a killjoy.

"Nope," Lenia grinned. "Saarthal first."

He smiled a little. An excavation he could handle.

"Alright," he replied, trying to keep his voice steady though his heart beat pounded against his chest.

"Guess we should leave soon then huh?"

* * *

Lenia knew Malath was trying to buy time, insisting they go through every crate in his entire house. They were filled to the brim. Once each one was inspected he would make decisions as to what he would take. That took a good hour or so until the picky Orc finally settled on a very worn set of ebony armor. She had an inkling suspicion that he knew what he wanted right from the start.

"This looks a little different," Lenia mused, holding up the chest piece.

There were no shoulder pauldrons for one. She could sense this set was a little different. "Enchanted?"

"Yup," Malath replied. "The only magical thing I tolerate. Other than you."

"Very interesting," she murmured, watching the Orsimer as he puttered around the crates.

He gently cradled artifacts in his hands as he placed everything back in the correct place. It was very orderly.

A satchel had been dug out for him, as well as a very beautiful ebony sword.

"Going with a theme here," Lenia joked, taking the sword from Malath's hands as he handed it to her.

"S'good stuff," he muttered, and she nodded.

They spent another half an hour packing up the satchels; the one she had brought as well as Malath's. It took a good ten minutes to help him into his armor, as he was quite restricted with movement. The Orsimer was very tense while she worked.

"Can you… stop—Malath!" Lenia huffed, wrenching on his arm.

He had it glued to his side and she moved in front of him to figure out what was going on. He stared at the girl, but he was focused on something beyond. Lenia panicked a little bit.

"Malath what's wrong?" she asked softly, and the Orsimer chuckled. It was unsettling to hear.

"Funny," he replied slowly, suddenly moving.

He lifted up one armored arm and looked down at half of his ebony armor. From his hips down were still just breeches. "It still feels so familiar, and somehow foreign. But I need to fill it out."

His voice sounded slightly disappointed. Lenia knew he would gain his physical strength back in due time.

Lenia sighed in relief, and then quickly punched his arm. Malath growled, finally focusing on her, and rubbed his arm.

"What was that for?" He barked.

"For making me worry!" Lenia replied angrily, but she was smiling. "I thought you had turned to stone!"

"Oh," Malath replied and shook his head. "Sorry."

"It's ok," Lenia said softly, moving forward. She finished helping him put his armor on and stood back to look at her handiwork, a grin on her face.

He looked incredible.

"Wow," she commented breathlessly.

"What?" Malath glanced down nervously, fidgeting with the gauntlets.

"You look like a hero," She replied, and she swore the Orsimer blushed, though it was hard to tell with his dark skin.

"Oh stop," he replied darkly, "I am half the Orc I was when I last wore this armor."

"Well you are a bit thin," Lenia admitted, "but you look good. Once a warrior always a warrior. You carry yourself like you haven't spent a day away from an adventure."

That struck a chord, and Malath turned away from her. She watched as he brought a hand up to his face. Lenia couldn't tell if he was crying out not but she felt a little bad for overwhelming him so early in the morning.

 _Please don't back out now,_  she pleaded silently.

He stood with his back to her, and she picked up the ebony scabbard laying on the table. She brought it over to Malath.

"Here."

Lenia tapped his shoulder, and the Orc turned around.

"Nearly ready."

They stood by the door, adjusting their packs and double-checking for supplies. Lenia wore her blue mages robes and a pair of sturdy leather boots. Two staffs were strapped to her back along with a satchel and bedroll. One staff was lightning, the other flames. Malath's ebony sword hung by his side and it looked completely at home. Lenia tried not to beam too much with happiness, but it was hard. The Dragonborn himself would be traveling with her. A nobody apprentice mage. it was truly an honor.

They entered into the street and Malath locked the door, taking his sweet time to do so. She knew he was nervous, and so Lenia tried to be as comforting as possible.

"Oh, what about your housecarl?" Lenia piped up as they began walking down the hill. "Won't she want to know you're leaving?"

"I don't care," came the Orc's short response. Lenia didn't push it.

They traveled the short distance to the gates. It took a moment to realize that Malath had stopped several steps back from her as she reached the guards standing by.

"Malath?"

He didn't answer her, and the guards gave him a few curious glances.

"I haven't left Whiterun for three and a half years," he whispered, his voice so deep and low that she barely caught what he said.

"Now's a good time, good weather" Lenia replied cheerfully.

But he didn't move a muscle. She sighed.

"Come on," she continued quietly, "don't make me hold your hand in front of all these men."

Malath gave her a sharp glance, and Lenia stuck her tongue out at him to try and ease his nervousness. Suddenly he shook himself out of his stupor and strode forward, pushing open the gate. He continued walking quickly, never looking back at the city, and did not slow down until they had made walked several feet down the road.

"I'm proud of your enthusiasm," Lenia called out, nearly running to catch up with the tall roaming Orsimer. "But you're going the wrong direction.

Malath stopped, and she knew he was seeing his surroundings for the first time.

His laughter echoed in her ears; startling nearby deer, and it was the nicest sound in the world.


	8. Chapter 8

Malath didn't understand himself sometimes.

_Why did I choose to go with a mage of all people, to a place I hate more than anything…? I'll never know._

It must have been her charm, that sweet little smile, and caring nature. It was compelling. And bewitching. He didn't like it one bit.

The fact that Malath didn't ask for the help wasn't important, she was going to give it to him anyways. It bothered him how quickly she brought about these changes. She really had him good.

Malath also refused to admit to himself that he was out of shape. As the sky turned brighter, the sun had begun to seriously warm him up. It didn't help that he was desperately wanting alcohol. So much so that he felt jittery. Sweat began forming on his forehead and it dripped down his back, sweltering hot under the armor. He could just feel how disastrously out of shape he had become, as his calves started burning lightly with each step. The Orc's lungs felt rubbed raw trying to take in the fresh air. With each hour it grew worse, and yet he plodded on without complaint.

He was well aware of Lenia's presence beside him. Aware of her eyes on him. He knew she was watching to make sure he was alright, and that just fueled him to continue, to push harder.

"Malath."

Lenia's voice called out for the first time since they started walking. He was startled but continued his steady pace. He could feel the fiery burn of muscles that hadn't been used for ages screaming in agony.

"Malath," Lenia's voice persisted, and he continued to ignore her. "Perhaps we should stop and rest a while? It's nearly noon."

"Why?" Malath growled breathlessly, shooting the elf a glance.

She kept a pace back from him and did not look even a small bit phased by the walk.

"Cause I'm old and withered?"

"Malath…" Lenia replied quietly, catching up to him.

She laid a hand on his shoulder. Finally, Malath stopped, and rested his hands on his thighs, gasping for air.

"Drink," she commanded, handing him a water skin.

Malath accepted it and took a deep drink.

"You know you can't just throw yourself back into the swing of things full force. It'll take time to get your endurance and strength back."

"Pshaw!"

Malath spat at the ground and roughly pushed the water skin back into her hands. He started up at a brisk walk.

"You're such a stubborn Orc!" Lenia called after him, and after hastily stuffing the skin back into her satchel she effortlessly caught up with him.

"yeah… so… so what?" Malath replied, feeling his throat constrict tightly.

"We need to stop Malath, it's time for a bite to eat and rest. I'm not treating you any differently, I need a break too."

"You?" Malath replied, sneering.

He stopped walking and stared out at the plains of Whiterun hold, his chest heaving. Instead of taking the main road they had decided to cut through the land to save time. It was quite alright with him, considering how many times he had walked this landscape. Malath knew from experience that taking the well-known roads didn't always make it safe.

"You need to rest? You're just floating beside me, without so much as breaking a sweat."

"That's not true…" Lenia scoffed, and before he could stop her the girl caught his hand and brought it up to her forehead.

She pressed his palm against her soft gold skin. She was in fact, sweating, although nowhere near as much as the Orc.

"Okay okay," Malath grumbled, hastily retracting his hand from hers.

He silently thanked the chance to rest. Malath wouldn't let her see his relief, and he had to resist the urge to throw himself down on the ground. Instead, he gently lowered his pack and sank to his knees. He sighed quietly under his breath, and his legs praised him for giving them a break. It felt so wonderful. He almost didn't want to get back up again. Malath sifted through his pack and found a few strips of Horker jerky; which he hastily consumed, along with a bit more water. He could really go for some ale, but he was pretty sure that wasn't something they had packed. He was now left wishing he had smuggled some into his satchel and ignored the fact that his hands were beginning to shake.

Lenia sank down into the golden grass, and after retrieving her own meal she gazed out at the plains before them while she ate. Malath watched her inconspicuously, noticing that the wind had picked up a little bit and now played with the locks of her curly hair. Lenia paused to tuck a strand behind her pointed ear and smiled at him. Malath shook his head and forced his eyes away, gulping down a few more sips of water. Then he awkwardly clambered to his feet. It felt like almost an impossible task. He immediately felt like throwing up.

 _How did I ever wear armor?_  He thought weakly, growling quietly.

Piercing pain stabbed into his stomach as a wave of nausea flowed through him. It took a moment to get his bearings straight.

His body had not been prepared for the confines he had put it in. Malath knew it was only going to get worse before it got better. With that frustrating realization, he crossed his arms over his chest and stared pointedly at the elf. She hadn't noticed him stand up. He coughed.

"Ready?" Lenia asked, glancing over at him.

Malath nodded, and she began to put her things away. The girl rose gracefully to her feet and again smiled at him, to which he returned the gesture with a small scowl. The Orc stalked back down the unbeaten path, heading North.

They stopped for camp just after sunset. Malath was grateful to be sitting at noon, but he was even more grateful for the break now. His body had reached past the point of feeling pain and was entirely numb. He knew he'd feel the after-effects of having pushed himself too hard the next morning. Malath grimaced, not bothering to try and sit down with some dignity. He flopped down on to the grass. It was still warm from the day's sunshine. It rustled quietly, and his hearing picked up many sounds that he hadn't heard in a long time. Birds called to one another, the wind as it danced through the blades of grass and wheat. The sounds of nature that he had long since neglected to revel in as he drove deeper into his darkness. Back in Breezehome where he was all alone. Even the fresh air was healing. All those sounds came rushing to his ears full force. It was musical.

There was a crackle, and he glanced over to find Lenia lighting a fire with her mage-flames. She had gathered what wood she could find in the area and now set about preparing a hot meal. Malath didn't offer to help. He was grumpier than ever after the day's stroll. Although his body begged to sleep his mind was buzzing. He had felt the thrill creep up his spine when he first stepped foot outside Whiterun. The excitement of a new adventure, and, a slight fear. But he'd never admit it since he was not the same warrior he used to be when he was Dragonborn. Was. He supposed he still was the Dragonborn, but a useless one. There were no more dragons in Skyrim, at least no one had spotted them for over a year. Malath kept the knowledge of his one shout to himself; the one that would summon Odahviing. He'd probably be less than capable of defending himself and Lenia against anything more than a mudcrab.

Her voice brought Malath out of his thoughts.

"Malath? Are you okay? You're awfully quiet over there."

Malath turned his head and met Lenia's warm gaze, feeling a scowl cross his features.

"I'm tired," Malath replied simply, and my then his stomach growled. "Hungry too."

"Well, it'll be ready in a minute," Lenia told him quietly, and she turned back to the new cooking pot.

She had purchased it earlier in the morning while Malath had been rooting through crates.

Malath wearily dragged his hand across his face, silently berating himself for being such an ass to the girl. She was just trying to help him. However, he reckoned with himself a little bit, noting that it has been so long since he'd interacted with people.

 _She's just going to have to get used to it,_  he thought firmly, and then as an afterthought,  _by Malacath I could use a bottle or five of wine._

Malath could feel that familiar longing, the one that urged him to drink his troubles away. He had felt it throughout the day, but at night time it was always worse. If he were still at home he wouldn't have that problem, he'd be pissed drunk by the middle of the afternoon.

Malath went about setting up his bedroll, trying not to groan too loudly as his body protested against such movement. When he was finished Malath was handed a bowl of hot stew.

"Smells good," he mumbled, eagerly spooning a mouthful of potato and beef. He could admit by now that she was a decent cook.

"Thanks," Lenia replied softly.

Malath watched as she scooped a portion into her own bowl and then sat down across from him. By the firelight, he could see her clearly as she gently blew on a spoonful of stew. He resisted the urge to chuckle. He paid no heed to the temperature of his stew as he quickly gulped down his steaming food, and then served himself another.

"There are a few bread rolls," Lenia's voice called from his left, and Malath put the spoon back down.

For a moment he rooted in a satchel for the bread. Once he had found it he grabbed one for himself and tossed another to the elf.

"So," Lenia started after the Orc had sat back down with a murmur of curse words. "How was your first day back?"

"Back?"

"Yeah, back to work as an Adventurer."

"Oh."

Malath tore a chunk of the bread roll off with his teeth. He chewed for a moment, thinking. "Okay I guess, still wondering if this was a good idea or not."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Lenia inquired, and Malath shrugged. He took a deep breath.

"Even… even being back here, in a place I love…. I still want to drink my face off."

"Malath…"

Lenia paused as she went over to him. He frowned, but she did not try to touch him Instead she sat down on his bedroll.

"That's only natural. You've been sober for not even one day. I know this isn't going to be easy right away, but eventually, it will get better."

"I hope you're right," Malath replied, surprising himself by his response.

Lenia smiled up at him reassuringly, and he sighed.

"I hope you're right…"

* * *

Waking Malath the next morning was like rousing a sleeping Sabre cat. No, more like waking five Sabre cats. She'd never seen such an outburst from him before. It was almost amusing, except for the angry part.

"Malath…" Lenia called out softly, wary about getting too close to the guy.

He lay on his bedroll, snoring quite loudly, with his back to her.

"Malath!"

She poked his shoulder a few times, and then quickly retreated out of arms reach. It was a wise move. The Orsimer violently swung his arm out and then groaned, rolling onto his back. His eyes were still closed.

"Fuck off."

"Hey… I won't stand for verbal abuse mister. It's time to rise and shine!"

"I swear to God Lenia if you don't leave me alone…" Malath threatened, his voice full of anger.

"Come on, can't you feel the pain already?" She tried to reason with him. "The sooner you get up and moving, the better it will be."

He was silent. Lenia thought perhaps he'd fallen asleep again.

"Malath…?"

"By Malacath Lenia!" Malath roared, swiftly moving into a sitting position.

She watched, cowering by the ashes of last night's fire, as the Orc slowly realized just how much his body hurt. It was a sad sight.

"Oh Gods…" he mumbled, and his body began to tremble.

Lenia hesitated. She had a calming spell prepared and a health potion in one hand. But she didn't want to provoke the enraged Sabre.

"Lenia, Lenia oh Gods!" Malath whimpered, and she quickly rushed forward.

"Shh, shh Malath, everything's okay," Lenia whispered soothingly, rubbing his back.

His eyes were tightly closed, and she could tell he was resisting the urge to cry. His hands were bunched up into fists. Lenia cast her calming spell, letting it wash over him, and continued to rub his back.

"Drink this, you'll feel a bit better. It'll numb your pain to a dull ache."

Lenia continued to rub his back, her thoughts whirling.

_I knew he was going to have some problems, an Orsimer hiding in his home for years was bound to have complications with his body. But perhaps this was not the best way to go about it. A gradual integration would have served him better. He also has severe withdrawal from alcohol, which I'm not exactly equipped to deal with._

She felt horrible. Once Malath had finished drinking the contents of the bottle he handed it back to her. Then he let out a shaky sigh, and his hands relaxed. The Orsimer slowly opened his eyes, blinking at the morning sunlight, and glanced over at Lenia.

"Next time let me fucking sleep," he growled, roughly pushing her arm back.

Lenia almost fell onto her rump but caught herself and stayed kneeling just in case. She was not angry. She watched Malath as he climbed unsteadily to his feet and stalked away from the camp. After a moment she also stood up and lightly brushed her clothes.

"Well, that wasn't too bad," Lenia spoke out loud, and then she waited for the grumpy Orc to come back.

Getting his armor back on was a nightmare, filled with a constant stream of curse words and empty threats to hit me.

"Maybe I should sleep in it," He growled, wincing when Lenia tightened the strap of his chest piece.

"No, that would be worse!" She exclaimed, softly whacking his chest.

She earned herself wordless growl.

"What day is it?" Malath asked after a minute, and she raised her eyebrow up in curiosity. "What?" he scoffed, "Orcs aren't allowed to know what day it is? Shall I just continue blundering blindly into the wilderness with you unaware of time and distance?"

"Calm down. Your question just seems out of the blue, that's all," Lenia replied quietly, stepping back. "It's the ninth of First Seed."

"Huh…" Malath replied quietly and he snorted.

"Okay. Let's go."

He began climbing the hill and Lenia followed closely behind him.

She watched Malath while they traveled. The day before he seemed uncomfortable and angry that she watched him. He was always scowling and glancing back at her. However today he stared ahead of him the entire time. It was almost as though he'd forgotten she was there. It made her very curious.

When they stopped for lunch at noon, Malath didn't protest. He wordlessly lowered his pack to the ground and sat on a small boulder. He began rummaging for food. Lenia watched him from a short distance, wondering what was on the Orsimer's mind that kept him so quiet. She sifted through her pack and retrieved a water skin.

"How are you feeling now?" Lenia called out, startling him. "Do you need another potion?" Malath looked over at her, and for a moment she thought he was seeing her for the first time.

"No… I'm alright."

His deep voice barely reached his ears, and she nodded, saying no more.

The rest of the day followed in the same matter. Lenia was beginning to grow more worried as the sun started setting. She didn't wish to push the Orc, but she was burning to know what he was thinking. As the sky was alight with the beautiful colors of a sunset, she watched Malath as he walked several paces ahead of her. His feet dragged considerably, and Lenia knew they needed to make camp soon. She opened her mouth to call out to him when all of a sudden, she heard a low growl. Freezing, Lenia quickly brought her hands up and prepared a strong firebolt in her palms. She peered around in the half-dark for the source of the growling. But when she glanced over at where she thought Malath would be, he was gone.

"Malath?" Lenia called out, her voice frantic.

There was a yelp, and then silence. Lenia crested the hill and spotted Malath standing over the corpse of a black-furred wolf. A howl echoed around them.

"There's another one," Malath growled, and she noticed the dark blood on his sword.

He looked tense, his forehead scrunched, and his stance was that of an experienced fighter. Lenia nodded, and they easily found the second beast, as it came charging towards them.

Stupid animal, Lenia thought to herself, as Malath stepped back and allowed her to use magic. The wolf yelped and fell lifelessly to the ground.

"We should make camp."

Lenia turned around and watched Malath wiped his bloody sword with a small piece of cloth. He then he placed it back in its sheath. The pair continued silently for a few feet until they reached a more sheltered area of rocks nestled between a few dead trees. Lenia lowered her pack to the ground and prepared to search for firewood when she heard his voice call out from farther away. He was yet again nowhere near the elf.

"I'm getting the wood," he explained, and Lenia watched his dark form grow smaller and smaller.

Lenia frowned and resolved herself to find to out what was up with the sullen Orc. She busied herself with preparing to cook dinner and set up her bedroll. She glanced over at Malath's pack and then quickly unrolled the Orc's sleeping mat as well. She sat down on her own and waited for his return. Malath arrived a little while later; a small pile of branches clutched to his chest. He lowered them to the ground. Lenia reached her hand out and allowed a small spark of flames to light the fire. She noticed the Orsimer when he winced slightly, and then shook his head.

Once dinner was happily cooking away in the pot, Lenia finally found the courage to talk to him.

"Hey, Malath?" Lenia called quietly, watching as he turned his head her way.

He had sat down on his bedroll immediately after she'd helped him take his armor off and stared at the fire silently.

"Yeah?" He grunted.

"Is there something important about the ninth of First Seed?" she inquired softly, not wishing to push the subject too hard.

Malath glanced over at the fire and was silent for a moment.

"It's almost to the day when my parents were murdered."

 _Murdered? That's terrible._  Lenia was stunned.

"I understand, and I'm so sorry that happened to your parents Malath…" Lenia crawled closer onto his bedroll and took his hand.

It was smooth, though rougher than his own skin, and callous free.

"How did they… they…."

"It doesn't matter," Malath replied harshly, scowling at the fire.

He did not pull away from her touch, and she took that as a good sign.

"I'd rather just… forget about this."

"You don't have to go through things alone anymore. You know that right?"

Malath finally took his eyes off from the fire and looked down at Lenia. For a moment he was silent as they stared at one another.

"I know," he sighed. "It's just... this is happening so fast. I don't know how to feel. How to act. I could really use a barrel of ale right now."

"Just accept it for what it is." Lenia smiled, and she gripped his hand tighter. "We don't know each other very well, but you were kind to me even as a stranger. Even with your stubbornness and colorful temper," she joked, and Malath chuckled.

The sound warmed her heart. Lenia waited a few minutes before she finally stood up and finished dinner. This time they sat together on one bedroll and ate. Lenia had noticed that Malath's hands were shaking while he ate, and she wondered how much worse he felt on the inside. She knew he wouldn't reveal that to her if he could avoid it. He was still a proud Orc.

They sat by the fireside for quite some time, swapping pleasant stories about childhood memories, smiling and laughing a little as they took a trip down memory road. The atmosphere was light and nostalgic, but little did Lenia know the struggle that was still to come later that night.


	9. Chapter 9

For the very first time, Malath was unable to sleep. This was troublesome for an Orc who's only hobby involved drinking so much alcohol that he passed out literally anywhere at any time. It was troublesome for an Orc that loved to be unconscious. It was his favorite thing to do, second to drinking.

Malath lay on his bedroll in almost total darkness, trying to relax. But he couldn't. The fire was beginning to die down, and he stared at the embers as they glowed. The air was slightly chilly, but his skin felt like it was on fire. He was roasting in his bedroll, so Malath flung the covers off. It didn't help one bit. The next moment he was terribly cold.

 _What the fuck is going on?_  His mind screamed as he felt his entire body burning.

He was cold and not cold all at the same time. He felt his mind turning to mush in a way that was completely foreign to him. He wasn't drunk, so what was it?

Malath didn't know how much time had passed, but his breathing grew more labored as the sweat rolled down his bare skin and cooled in the night air. He felt like his throat was constricting, and so he sat up in his bedroll and took several deep breaths, trying to calm down. Sitting up was a bad idea, for when he did everything began to swim around him. The fire swirled around in circles and when he looked down at his hands they were distorted in a way that completely freaked him out.

Lenia heard him moving. She was almost asleep but not quite. She rolled over onto her side and glanced over at him.

"Is something wrong?" she called out, and Malath looked over at her.

She could see him trembling from where she lay in her bedroll.

"I-I'm hot, and then I'm cold." Malath whimpered and then began clawing at his shirt.

Lenia threw her covers back and came over to him. She knelt down in the grass and placed a hand on his shoulder, allowing a calming spell to wash over him. It helped a little, but the Orc was still sweating profusely.

"I knew this would happen," she murmured softly, trying to comfort him. "You're going through withdrawal from the alcohol."

"How..." Malath huffed, wiping at his face. "H-how long does this last?"

"A few hours, maybe longer. It can come and go. Try to lay down."

Lenia coaxed Malath back into laying position and then retrieved a small cloth. She gently dabbed at his forehead and smoothed his hair back.

"I feel like I downed a bottle of skooma," Malath whispered hoarsely, his throat burning dry. "Water," he gasped.

Lenia retrieved a pouch of water and Malath quickly took it from her hands. With his own shaky hands, Malath dumped half of the water all over his face and then poured some into his mouth. It helped a little bit.

"You're going to be alright, it will stop."

"Okay."

Malath blinked several times and let out a deep, shaky breath. Lenia went back to her bedroll and laid down, but she did not go back to sleep. She wanted to make sure Malath was going to be alright.

Getting through the night was not an easy task. Several times Malath rose from his bedroll in a half-delirious state and called out for his mother. He must have drifted off into sleep several times because his eyes would close, but it wouldn't last long before he jerked awake again. Each time he woke up, his body drenched in sweat and shaking, Lenia would get up and walk back over to him. She'd quickly place her hand on his shoulder and cast a calming spell. It was the only thing she knew she could do. Sometimes the Orc would roll out of bed and dry heave into the grass. He had already thrown up whatever was in his stomach several hours earlier. The sound made Lenia wince.

"Mother!" Malath gasped, and his body jerked as he awoke for the fifth or sixth time that night.

The sky was beginning to grow lighter, as dawn neared. Lenia was exhausted, but she would not sleep until Malath had improved. She had no idea how long this was going to go on for. It was hard to listen to his cries. What she gleaned from his ramblings is that he witnessed his parents or somebody he was close to getting hurt by magic. It made her heart ache to have a slight understanding of where his fear and distrust of magic came from. Lenia was glad he allowed her around him.

Several more hours passed, and the sun had completely risen before Malath finally slept soundly. The poor thing still trembled slightly, and his breathing was uneven, but he finally slept. Lenia took this opportunity to get a little shut-eye in, although it was hard for her in broad daylight.

A little more time passed before she woke up, the sun was too warm for her. She sat up in her bedroll and took a deep breath of the crisp Skyrim air. She stretched her arms above her head and heard a satisfying crack from her shoulders. Lenia then stood up and stretched some more, shaking her legs slightly to encourage blood flow. Malath was motionless in his bed across the now lifeless firepit. Lenia wandered up away and gathered some more firewood, making sure she kept an eye on the sleeping Orc. She returned to him and dumped the wood as quietly as she could on the cold ash. A small fire spell quickly brought the fire pit to life, and Lenia busied herself with making breakfast. They would need to stop and replenish their supplies before they reached Saarthal, but so far, they were doing pretty good.

Malath stirred ever so slightly, and Lenia paused, staring at him. He groaned, and cracked one eye open, fixing it on the elf.

"Am I dead," he croaked, and Lenia laughed.

"That's quite dramatic," she responded with a smile, and Malath coughed. "You're definitely alive."

"I feel like I've been thrown around in a barrel all night long."

"Drink this then."

Lenia handed him a small green vial. Malath shifted into a sitting position and downed the drink in one go. He grimaced slightly, and then looked down at his shirt.

"Uh yeah," Lenia commented, gesturing to his clothes. "You'll need to change. I actually think there's a river nearby, you could also wash up."

"Probably a good idea," Malath sniffed and then frowned. "A great idea."

Lenia smiled. He had a rough night, and she was sure it wasn't over yet, but she could already see a little improvement. His gaze was much clearer, and she knew his eyes were a striking shade of green now. But he was still very tired looking, and he needed to gain a lot more weight back.

 _Progress_ , she thought to herself.  _There is progress, and that's all I could ever ask for._

* * *

Together they packed up their belongings and headed in the direction Lenia thought provided a place to wash. After about twenty minutes of walking, their ears picked up the sound of running water, and they arrived at the edge of a small river. She knew there'd be no bathing once they entered into Winterhold, which should be no more than a few more days of walking. She hoped that the clothing she had prepared for Malath would be warm enough. The pair made pretty good time, despite Malath's physical disadvantages.

"You can go first," Lenia offered, setting down her pack.

"Just go around the corner of that rock there, you'll be out of sight. I'll keep an eye out."

"Thanks."

Malath didn't argue. He smelled terrible and was eager to be rid of his filthy clothes. Lenia smiled and pointed to a smaller satchel.

"That has soap and drying cloths."

Malath nodded and wordlessly gathered the necessary items for his bath. Once he was ready, the Orc quietly clambered down to the river and wove around the rocks until Lenia was out of sight. He stopped at the edge of the river, reveling in the sounds of the running water as it bubbled over the rocks like music. Malath stripped his clothes off and wandered into the ice cold water, gasping as it pierced his sensitive skin. Shivering, Malath wandered in the water until it was up to his knees and found a flat enough rock for him to sit down so he could wash. It felt good to be out in nature again, and he took his time, making sure every inch of him was clean.

_Last night was terrible._

His thoughts swirled around his skull, and he felt clearer than he had in a long time. But it was still a struggle.

_I just feel sorry that I put Lenia through that as well._

His thoughts drifted to the girl, as they so often did these days. She was beautiful, and he knew there was an attraction there for him. Malath also knew that he needed to suppress every shred of those feelings.

_I doubt she'd ever see me that way. I'm more like a messed up brother she's trying to help._

Malath shook his head and placed the bar of soap down on the rock. It was hard to do, as he nearly dropped in the river more than once. Feeling refreshed, Malath slipped off the rock and dipped his whole body into the icy cold water. He dunked his head under the current, making sure his hair got clean as well. After he surfaced, Malath swam back to the boulder and retrieved the soap. He clambered rather noisily out from the river and, shivering as the cold air washed over his wet skin, began drying himself off as quickly as he could. His hands shook and his teeth chattered together, but he felt rejuvenated.

Malath had only been able to slip a pair of clean tan breeches up over his bony hips and slipped on one leather boot; when he heard a rustling from behind him. Malath immediately stiffened, and his arm twitched towards his sword when a voice called out.

"Don't even think about it, Orc." A female voice sneered. He didn't recognize it.

"Just give me all of your gold and whatever other valuable possessions. This doesn't have to end badly."

Malath snorted. He hated a thief that tried to have morals.

_There is no such thing as an honest thief._

Ignoring her commands, Malath bolted towards his sword, and he heard a whoosh of something hot as a firebolt blasted by him. He felt the heat of it as it narrowly missed his shoulder. Malath awkwardly swung around, feeling the earth floor as it dug into one boot-less foot. But he ignored it. Adrenaline was coursing through him in the best of ways. He felt the excitement of a fight in his tired muscles, and he charged the black-robbed night elf with a roar.

He was used to fighting people who used magic, but Malath was a little rusty. A second firebolt grazed his bare shoulder, and he grimaced as he charged on. The elf was not fast enough, and she was forced to draw a short little knife. Malath almost laughed at how pitifully she waved it around, and he easily avoided her swipes. He remembered everything, and it was almost like he hadn't let himself go. It didn't take long for the woman to make a wrong move, opening herself up to him. Malath raised his arm and quickly punched his sword through her chest. The woman screamed as she died, and Malath quickly drew back. Blood had spurted over his chest, and he was glad he hadn't gotten around to putting a shirt on. The dark elf crumpled to the ground and did not move.

For a second, he stood there, his chest heaving, as his adrenaline slowly started to dissipate. He wondered where the mage had come from, and if there were more. He remembered Lenia, and the thought of her jolted him.

Malath ran back to where his belongings lay on the rocks and grabbed his boot. He hastily shoved it on and then ran back up the little hill to where Lenia should still be. As he crested the top he spotted the elf. She stood away from their packs, her knees bent slightly and arms raised as she cast spells. She moved every so often to avoid getting hit by frost bolts from her opponent.

 _So, there was a pair,_  he noted and watched Lenia as she fought.

He didn't wish to intervene unless she needed help. Her opponent was also female but looked human. It was hard to tell as the woman kept moving, but Malath noticed the faint design of a skull on her dark robes.

_Necromancers._

Lenia moved with ease. She was pretty good at judging her opponent's movements, however, one ice bolt grazed past her neck, instantly leaving a trail of ice. It didn't faze her. Lenia flicked her wrists, sending forth her most powerful fire spell, and met her mark. The woman cried out in pain as the fire burst into her chest, and then she crumpled to the ground. Her body continued to burn for a few more moments before the spell wore out. Lenia lowered her arms, and then looked around for Malath. Once she spotted him, she jogged over to him.

"You had one too," she called out, and Malath nodded.

She could see the dark crimson of blood already drying on his chest.

"We shouldn't stay here much longer, there could be more."

"They're necromancers," Malath replied, and the elf nodded.

"Yes. Not a type of mage I care to deal with."

Lenia brushed at her neck as the ice started to melt off of her.

"Your shoulder... is it ok?"

"Oh." Malath looked down at the burn. "Yeah it's fine, I will go get my stuff."

"You managed alright?" Lenia inquired, and Malath scoffed.

"Of course."

"Good."

Once Malath had washed off the blood and finished getting dressed, he made his way back to Lenia. However, once he reached the dark elf's corpse he couldn't resist seeing if she had anything on her.

Doesn't hurt to look, he chuckled and rifled through the woman's pockets.

There wasn't much of interest besides a little pouch of gold and two soul gems. He took those, knowing Lenia could use them. He brought them over to Lenia, who was ready to leave. She also had his armor ready to put on. Her pack and two staffs rested on her back, and she waited for him.

"Thanks," Lenia murmured when Malath handed the soul gems to her. "I was going to bathe as well, but I don't think it's safe. I think there might be a camp of them nearby."

"You sure?"

"Yes, it'll be alright, we'll be in Winterhold soon and I can get clean once we're at the excavation site."

Once Malath was ready, the pair made their way once again through the plains of Whiterun. They made good time and did not encounter any more necromancers that day. Malath's muscles still ached, but it was a good feeling. He was beginning to feel like his old self.


	10. Chapter 10

If Lenia wasn't mistaken, there was maybe two more day's walk before they could reach an inn. She had brought a rather weathered map of Skyrim, and although she wasn't a professional at reading it, she had a base understanding.

It was nighttime, and the pair had decided to stop and rest for the night. Lenia sat on her bedroll quietly pouring over the map in the firelight. Dinner cooked in the pot, and the smells wafted over to her. Her tummy rumbled quietly, and so she fished out a hunk of bread to chew on while she waited. Malath noticed the map and came over to her.

"I haven't looked at a map in years," Malath commented, kneeling down beside her.

Lenia shifted the paper sideways so Malath could look at it. The Orc drew one finger across it from Whiterun and mumbled under his breath.

"What did you say?" Lenia inquired curiously.

_Of course he'd know how to read a map._

"I'd say we're about here."

Malath pointed to a spot close to where Lenia had assumed they were.

"So, you're taking us in this direction."

he drew his finger up to a spot marked on the map.

"Nightgate Inn."

"Yes, that's the one. We can sleep indoors for once and replenish our food supplies."

"Sounds good to me."

Malath stood up and wandered over to the cooking pot. He stirred the contents for a few moments. Then he served himself a bowl once Lenia called out that it was probably ready. He also scooped a bowl for the elf and handed it to her.

They sat in comfortable silence. Malath was thinking about the day's earlier fight. He felt pretty good, but of course, the usual tug of addiction called to him. He felt better about everything overall.

 _I could get used to this_ , he thought with a small smile.  _Traveling around with the girl._

The rest of their night was uneventful, and after they finished eating dinner Lenia helped Malath out of his armor. She handed him a potion, which he gratefully drank. Even though his mind felt clearer, his body still felt like shit. He longed for the day where a simple walk didn't pain him anymore. After a while, Lenia stood up and looked over at him.

"I'm going to put up some runes."

"Runes?"

"Yes. There are a few different types. You cast them on a surface and if somebody gets too close they'll be triggered. I usually put them all around myself when I'm traveling alone. Most bandits and thieves don't know how to spot them."

"Makes sense."

Malath was still uncomfortable about magic, but he understood Lenia was a responsible mage and did not use her powers for dark work. At least, he was pretty sure. He didn't wish to think about the necromancers they had encountered earlier. It left a pit in his stomach.

Lenia and Malath both lay in their separate bedrolls, staring up at the starry sky. Lenia drifted to sleep rather quickly, and Malath followed shortly after. That night he dreamt of things past. Of certain women, he had been with in his lifetime. Of one, in particular, an Orsimer like him. He had almost loved her until things ended badly. Her face danced in and out of his dreams, and then his parents appeared as well. Malath did not sleep soundly and woke up early the next morning.

With each passing day, Malath felt his muscles grow stronger. Already his legs were beginning to burn less and less. He was surprised at how fast he was adapting to traveling again. He thought it would be much more of a struggle.

In the far distance, they could see the snow-dusted terrain of the Winterhold. Malath was not looking forward to traveling in snow. It was his least favorite type of weather, as it always left him cold and wet with numb fingers and toes. Lenia looked indifferent, and together they quietly plodded on. As they drew nearer, Lenia slowed her steps until she stopped entirely.

"I have some warmer clothes for us," Lenia began, and she slung her pack off her shoulders. "I found them in one of your crates, I'm assuming they'll fit you."

Malath took the fur coat Lenia offered and held it up. He didn't remember it, so he must have just taken it for the sake of taking it. He did that a lot in his travels.

"What about you?" Malath asked, looking over at her. Lenia shrugged.

"I'm usually alright. I have a coat if I need it."

"In that flimsy robe?" Malath scoffed, raising one eyebrow. Lenia simply smiled.

"I'm not just wearing a flimsy robe." She pulled the collar of her rob down, revealing soft brown leather underneath. So, she was wearing armor.

"It is enchanted to keep my body heat completely encased. Some of the students at college are very good at coming up with handy little spells."

"Sounds nice," Malath replied, and he glanced down at his coat.

"Well," Lenia replied smartly, "If you want, I'm sure yours can be done as well. But you'll have to ask J'Zargo. I don't know how to cast it."

"Maybe."

It was still light enough out that Lenia suggested they keep walking a bit further before making camp for the night. Several more hours passed as they walked in near silence. The sounds of their booted feet crunching over the snow echoed all around them, along with the whistling of the wind. Malath shivered slightly and pulled his coat closer around his ebony armor.

"I guess we'll find-" Lenia began to say when she stopped dead in her tracks.

It was too dark to see Malath's armor in action when he killed the wolf. But it was still light out, and she was able to see the enchantment in action. Malath glanced down at his body, noting the black wisps that flowed around him. He tensed and drew his sword.

"Is that... the enchantment?" Lenia asked, glancing around. "I thought it poisoned enemies?"

"It does," Malath replied quietly, roaming the landscape with his eyes. "It also lets me know when an enemy is close.

Lenia didn't need any more explanation. She raised her hands and powered a flame spell between her palms. It was a good thing they had been given a warning, as a moment later two raging mad ice wraiths flew through the air towards them.

"On your right!" Malath shouted, and he swung his sword at the wraith nearest to him.

It was quick, almost too quick for him to handle. He was getting better, but they were still tricky to strike. Their translucent bodies blended into the snowy landscape behind them. The wind had picked up as well, and snow fell in a flurry around them.

To his far right, Lenia was blasting the second wraith with fire, which seemed to scream. His attention had been momentarily distracted by glancing over at the girl, and the ice wraith swung its weird spiked body at the Orc. There was a loud icy crunch, and the wraith connected Malath yelled, and nearly dropped his sword in surprise as the wraith's body exploded in a shower of ice shards.

Lenia finished melting her wraith to death, and then she ran over to where Malath stood, brushing the shards off his coat and beard.

"I guess they're not immune to poison," Lenia joked, and she brushed some ice off of his shoulder.

Malath shrugged. He really didn't know.

I can't stand those things," he growled, looking down at the snow-covered ground. He could barely make out any trace of the corpse.

"Yeah, they're pretty annoying. It's hard to see them through the snow."

After recovering from their little skirmish, Lenia found them a more sheltered area to settle down for the night. Together they cleared a circular area of ground from the snow, and then Malath tethered a tarp between three small trees so that the snow wouldn't fall on them. While he was doing that, Lenia managed to find some firewood, and she settled down to make dinner. Malath unraveled his bedroll and sank down onto the covers. He thought maybe he was hallucinating it, but Malath swore he was beginning to fill it out.

 _It must be the elf's delicious cooking fattening me up_ , he thought to himself, glancing over at Lenia as she hovered over the fire.  _She is really good at it._

Tonight, Malath decided to leave his armor on, mostly because he knew he'd be too cold if he took it off. Lenia thought about protesting against it but decided not to. She would make sure he took a potion before sleep as well, to ensure he wasn't too sore the next morning.

After dinner, they both lay on their bedrolls. Lenia stared idly up at the tarp, her thoughts somewhere else. Malath watched the crackling fire, his thoughts nowhere in particular. Lenia was feeling a bit nervous. Within the next day, she was certain they'd reach Nightgate Inn. She would be glad to be indoors where it was nice and warm, and dry. But where there's an Inn, there's alcohol.

 _I know he's doing so well_ , she told herself with a sigh,  _but he cut it off very abruptly. There could be some slip-ups._

_I'll just have to be there if he falls and help him pick himself back up again._

With that final thought, Lenia settled down under the covers and drifted off to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

Nightgate Inn was a tiny establishment nestled near the mountains in the Pale. It was a quaint little cottage that Malath had frequented many times before, but now it had been close to six years since he had last stepped foot inside. All of his memories at Nightgate involved alcohol to one degree or another and as he approached the Inn at dusk with Lenia walking silently beside him the Orc couldn't help but feel a little apprehensive about returning.

He still suffered from the withdrawal of his addiction. It tugged on the recesses of his mind whether he was awake or asleep and sometimes the cravings were so strong it made him lash out, which Malath regretted when it happened to be Lenia on the other side of his ill-treatment. However, the Elf had taken it all in stride and not once had she taken his rude behavior personally. She didn't excuse it, and would often not help with his physical ailments unless he apologized first. Malath both resented and respected her firmness as he struggled to deal with it all.

As they reached the wooden steps to the Inn Lenia couldn't help but stop Malath for a moment with one gloved hand to his arm. She also had some concern with going into the Inn.

"What is it?" Malath grumbled. "I'm cold."

"I know, but just listen to me for a second."

Malath sighed and bowed his head. Inside the Inn warm bright light spilled out the windows from a roaring fire in the middle of the main hall. A cold breeze blew around the travelers and the wind played with strands of Lenia's hair, whipping them around her face as she peered up at the tired Orc.

"I know what you're going to say. You don't have to worry, I'll behave."

"Malath-"

"Lenia," Malath growled and he began walking up the stairs towards the front doors. "I will be fine. Hurry up."

Malath ignored Lenia's protests as he wrenched open the door to the Inn and strode inside. Light chatter and soft music echoed all around them as the pair wandered down the middle of the dining hall and past a roaring fire. They both welcomed the warmth since they had spent the last few days in the chilling cold with nothing more than a fabric tarp to keep the wind at bay.

Malath reached the counter first but did not say anything and waited patiently for Lenia to catch up. His eyes glanced around the room, noticing that almost every patron inside the Inn was drinking alcohol, and he swallowed hard as he tried to ignore the ever-present craving that called out to him. A tall bearded Nord behind the counter greeted Lenia with a big smile, which the Elf returned.

"You've made it back in one piece," Hadring teased. "And you've got a friend."

"I sure do," Lenia smiled, and she glanced over at Malath. "We'd like two beds if you got em."

"Ay, it'll be twenty gold."

Malath was staring pointedly at the barrels of mead located just behind the counter and it didn't go unnoticed by Lenia as she quickly counted out the gold from a small coin purse and was given two keys in return.

"Come on," Lenia called out softly and she nudged the Orc's arm. "Let's go put our packs down and then we'll have something to eat."

"Okay..." Malath replied quietly and he wasn't really listening to Lenia but he allowed himself to be steered towards the sleeping quarters.

Lenia rented two bedrooms for a reason. She wanted to allow him some degree of privacy since he was used to being alone. A part of her was rethinking her decision as she knew that Malath was struggling inside the Inn with so much alcohol present.

_Perhaps I should have rented one large bed so I could keep an eye on him..._

Lenia handed Malath one of the keys and he finally looked down at her.

"My room is right beside yours," she explained firmly. "Meet me in the dining hall when you're ready."

"Okay."

Lenia waited until he was inside his bedroom before she let out a big sigh and walked over to the door to her room. When she was inside she briefly glanced around, completely uninterested in the sparse furniture, and then she quickly dumped her pack on the ground and sat on the single bed with another small sigh. Lenia was unused to traveling so much. When she visited her parents in Solitude she had taken a carriage for most of the way. When Malath agreed to go with her Lenia hadn't thought that being cooped up in a carriage with potentially other riders wouldn't be a good idea for an Orc recovering from addiction and so she had decided against it.

As she gingerly rubbed her aching calves Lenia couldn't help but wonder if it had been the best decision. The trek to Saarthal would be even more difficult now that they were navigating snowy terrain and neither she nor Malath was in the greatest condition to brave it. She was impressed with his stamina so far but he was also recovering from his addiction at the same time and so the young Elf couldn't help but wonder if traveling by foot was too cruel.

_He's doing better than I was expecting but it's still far from being over._

Eventually, Lenia shook herself from her thoughts and quickly exited her room. She wanted to have a bath but was more interested in having a hot meal first and she wanted to ensure that Malath was going to be alright before they parted ways for the night.

When she entered the dining hall she found her quiet companion sitting alone at one of the tables. He held a mug in his hand and Lenia's heart skipped a beat as she drew closer. She silently prayed to the Gods that it was water as she plopped down on the wooden bench beside Malath. He glanced down at her with a quizzical expression and then took a sip of his drink.

"What are you drinking?" Lenia asked quietly.

"What do you think," Malath grumbled, feeling annoyed.

"I don't know, Malath. That's why I'm asking."

"It's water, taste it if you don't believe me."

Before Lenia could say anything Malath shoved the mug into her hands. She frowned for a moment and then took a sip. It was indeed just water.

"Alright, I'm sorry for asking."

"It's fine," Malath mumbled, and then he shrugged. "I'm hungry. I already ordered our dinner."

"Excellent, I'm hungry too."

The pair lapsed into a comfortable silence. A little while later a servant girl came by with their meals and she also placed a cup of water down on the table for Lenia along with a silver pitcher. They thanked the girl and began tucking into their dinner with great enthusiasm. As usual, the food was good and Lenia was grateful for the hot meal as she happily shoveled a forkful of mashed potatoes into her mouth. Beside her, Malath was almost completely finished his meal, and she wondered to herself if it had been enough.

"Do you need something more?" She inquired.

"No, I'm fine."

"Okay."

Malath placed his fork down and pushed it away with a small grumble and he rubbed his cheek, looking rather tired. A few minutes later Lenia finished eating as well and she leaned back in her seat with a content sigh, feeling properly full and sleepy. She watched Malath studying his profile as he also leaned back in his chair and silently stared at the fire roaring in the hearth before them. He looked like he had a lot on his mind as his eyes sometimes drifted to the other tables where different patrons of all races were drinking to their heart's content. He felt a tightness in his chest and after staring at one Nord in particular as he knocked back a bottle of ale he couldn't help but feel too many things all at once.

"You look tired."

Malath blinked as he was suddenly brought back to Lenia's presence and he turned his head towards her and shrugged.

"Guess so."

"Are you going to bathe tonight?"

"Probably just deal with it in the morning," Malath replied gruffly, and he yawned.

"Okay."

Lenia looked like she wanted to say no but she stared quietly down at her lap for a long moment and eventually she also yawned and rubbed at her tired eyes. Malath could tell that she was staying seated because he wasn't moving as well, and eventually he grew tired of just sitting without a drink in his hand so he started to stand up from the bench. Lenia got up as well and they quietly walked back to their rooms.

"Well, goodnight Malath. I'll wake you up in the morning. Oh yeah..."

Malath paused with his hand on the door handle and watched as the tiny Elf slipped her hands into the pockets of her robes and produced two tiny vials.

"One for pain, one for sleep, if you want them."

"Thanks," Malath grunted as Lenia placed the vials in the palm of his hand. "Night."

"Sleep well," Lenia replied softly and she smiled at him before they both entered into their respective rooms.

Instead of going to bed Lenia sought out a servant and requested a bath. When it was ready she stripped off her robe and armor, grimacing as she realized just how much she needed to get clean. Traveling was by no means easy, for many reasons, and Lenia was an Elf who highly regarded personal hygiene. It pained her that she could not bathe every day that she was on the road and she was grateful as she finished undressing and sank into the hot water of her little wooden tub with a smile. She quickly sank down into the soapy bath until she was almost completely submerged and she soaked there for a long while as she thought about her upcoming excavation in Saarthal.

 _I don't know what we'll find there, if anything,_  Lenia mused quietly to herself as she leaned back in the tub and rested her arms along the rim. But I'm excited to find out.  _Perhaps we'll find something interesting and it'll spark a flame in Malath._

Lenia couldn't help but smile at the thought of the Dragonborn becoming passionate about adventure again. She knew she had a big challenge ahead of her but she was more than up for it.

 _How do you entertain a person who has already experienced the adventure of a lifetime?_  She mused quietly to herself as she dipped her head back so her hair could soak.

_I've admired him for a long time. I still have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that he's the Dragonborn and he's traveling with me. I know the official story written in the textbooks but I'm dying to know everything that happened from his own mouth._

Eventually, the water grew too tepid for her liking and so Lenia quickly finished washing and then dried herself off. She slipped into a long cotton nightgown and considered going next door to make sure Malath was alright but she decided against it. She knew she was being a bit overwhelming with watching over him and so Lenia fought against the temptation to go to him. Instead, she forced herself to go to bed and tried to get a good night's sleep.

* * *

It was sometime in the middle of the night. Lenia knew it wasn't the morning when she peered up at the single window in her room and saw nothing but pitch black. A little voice inside Lenia's head urged her to go check on Malath but she resisted. However, after struggling to fall asleep for what seemed like forever the Elf finally gave in to her urges and silently got up from the bed. She quietly left her room and walked the couple feet over to Malath's room and she carefully opened the door so it wouldn't disturb the sleeping Orc.

Inside, it was completely dark. Lenia waited a few moments for her eyesight to adjust as she peered into the room, her eyes glued to the bed. As the image became clearer she could see that there was nobody occupying it and so she strode forward with a sigh. Malath was not sleeping. It didn't even look like he had attempted to go to sleep since the blankets were not disturbed. Lenia quickly spun back around and made her way towards the main hall where she knew she'd probably find the Dragonborn.

As predicted, Lenia spotted Malath's tall frame slumped over a table near the back of the room. She could see several empty bottles of ale strewn haphazardly across the table and as she got closer she could see that he had fallen asleep. His head rested on his arms and he snored loudly. Lenia paused, and she stared down at Malath with a sad expression.

_I knew he'd have some setbacks but I wasn't expecting him to drink this much._

Lenia partially blamed herself as she mused over what to do with the drunk Orc.

If I had only rented one room then perhaps he would have been more willing to go to bed with me there...

There was no use in placing blame and so Lenia shook her head and knelt down beside Malath as she placed a hand on his arm.

"Malath, wake up."

It was going to take a little more than calling out to him to wake him. Lenia gently shook his arm for a few moments as she continued to call his name.

"Malath," Lenia called again, and she began to tug his arm towards her. "Wake up!"

Finally, the Orc stirred. He slowly raised his head up but he swayed slightly as he struggled to comprehend what was going on. When he realized that Lenia was there he groaned and slumped back down on the table, wishing he was dead.

"Leave me alone," he growled.

"Malath you can't sleep here," Lenia replied firmly. "Get up."

"What's the point? I'm a piece of shit."

Lenia ignored Malath as she continued to tug on his arm. Eventually, he grew tired of her insistent pulling and he finally stumbled to an unsteady standing position. Then Lenia slipped her small frame under one of his arms and began steering him back towards his bedroom.

"Why... do you bother with... me," Malath grumbled as he moved slower than a snail down the hallway.

"Because I care," Lenia grunted as she struggled under Malath's weight. "You could try to walk a little bit you know."

Somehow, they reached the bed. Lenia tried her hardest to pull the covers back before the intoxicated Orc collapsed on top of it but she only managed to get it partway back as Malath flopped down. She was forced to tug the blanket out from under his legs and when it was finally free she shoved his body so he was laying properly on the bed and then she tucked the covers around his tall frame and sat down on the edge of the bed with a small sigh.

Malath laid on his stomach and his eyes were closed but he wasn't asleep. He knew he shouldn't have drunk the alcohol but he had felt helpless against the urges. With Lenia not hovering over him every five seconds he had let himself slip, not that he blamed her for what he did. He only blamed himself and he could barely face Lenia since he knew she was disappointed.

But as he laid on the bed with his thought swirling around his skull in a drunken haze he didn't want her to leave him alone. So, when Lenia made to stand up and leave him to sleep Malath couldn't stop himself from reaching out for her.

Lenia felt Malath grab her nightgown as she turned to leave. She paused and looked down at him but his eyes were still squeezed shut.

"Please stay."

It was for that exact reason that Lenia knew she had made the right choice back in Whiterun to help Malath. As she slipped under the covers without a single second of hesitation and she once against held the Dragonborn in her arms Lenia couldn't help but silently thanked any Gods that were listening that they had met that day at the marketplace. Underneath his addiction was an Orc that was hurting deeply and desperate for someone to love and care for him. He didn't need to say it for her to know. His actions spoke louder than words.

Malath buried his face into Lenia's chest and he clutched at her for a long while as the Elf gently rubbed his back until he fell asleep.

* * *

When Malath woke up he wasn't sure where he was. His body ached and there was a pounding in his temple that refused to go away. He groaned as he rolled onto his back and struggled to open his eyes. He could feel Lenia stirring as well. What he didn't know was that she had been awake for a few hours and had been unable to get up from the bed without disturbing the slumbering Orc and so she had stayed, drifting in and out of sleep while waiting for Malath to wake up.

Her hand had been resting on his arm and she'd been rubbing it gently as she stared up at the ceiling. Malath moved away from her and slowly tried to sit up but it was difficult. Lenia silently watched as the Orc struggled with what she knew was the ill feelings he felt after drinking so much alcohol the night before but she made no move to help him.

"What... What time is it?"

Malath squinted at the window with bloodshot eyes but he was unable to tell what time of the day it was.

"I'm not sure," Lenia shrugged and she sat up. "My guess is noon or later."

"Oh."

Malath let out a deep breath and reached up to gently rub his aching temple. He was well aware of what he had done and he could imagine how disappointed Lenia was.

"I'm sorry."

Lenia was silent for a moment as she slid towards the edge of the bed and stood up. She stretched her arms above her head until she heard a satisfying crack and then she finally turned back to the Orc as he slowly rose up to a sitting position. Malath placed both feet on the cold wooden floor and his head was bowed as he apologized.

"Why are you sorry?"

"I disappointed you."

"You didn't disappoint me, Malath."

The Orc lifted his head and he peered up at Lenia with a confused expression.

"I'm proud of how far you've come in such a short amount of time. I expect slip-ups, and you shouldn't beat yourself up over it."

"Why are you so nice?" Malath growled and he squeezed his eyes shut as a wave of nausea washed over him.

"Because I care," Lenia replied smoothly. "I know you find that difficult to believe but it's the honest truth."

"I..." Malath paused and then he groaned again.

"I'll get you a potion, and have someone draw up a bath."

"I've put you back a day."

"It's fine," Lenia replied as she walked over to the door and opened it. "It's not a big deal if they start without me."

Even though her smile was reassuring Malath couldn't help but continue to feel guilty as he waited for her to return. His head still ached something fierce and another wave of nausea passed through him. Just as Lenia returned the Orc lurched forward and snatched at the wooden bucket sitting on top of the dresser. She winced as the sounds of Matlath getting sick reached her ears but she went over to him anyways with an uncorked vial in her hand and gently rubbed his back.

When he was feeling a bit better Malath drank the vial and a servant entered a few minutes later and drew up some hot water for the tub. When she was gone Lenia turned towards the Orc, who was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head bowed.

"Come on, you should wash up. It'll help with the aches."

Lenia waited patiently for Malath to stop moving but he didn't she crossed her arms for a moment and sighed. A few minutes passed and he still didn't move and so she strode forward and began tugging on his tunic.

"Stop it," Malath growled.

"Let's go."

Malath swatted at Lenia's arms but she continued to try and remove his tunic.

"Knock it off."

"I've seen your torso before silly," she teased lightly. "No need to be shy."

"I said stop!"

A loud growl ripped from his throat as Malath shoved Lenia hard. She was unable to catch herself and she fell hard onto her butt on the floor and she was too shocked to say anything for a long moment as they stared at one another. Lenia could see that she had upset him greatly as he quickly turned his head away and glared down at the floor.

"Okay..." Lenia started quietly as she slowly rose to her feet. "Point taken. I'll leave you alone. If you need me I'll be out front."

Malath opened his mouth to respond but before he could get a word out Lenia slipped out from the room and firmly shut the door behind her. As she walked down the hall and found herself a free table to sit at she couldn't help but feel bad that she had gone too far.

_I was trying to be helpful but it's not what Malath needed at that time and I only succeeded in pissing him off._

Back in the bedroom, Malath was a mess of emotions as he struggled to undress with shaking hands. He was too embarrassed to admit even to himself that he was ashamed of the state of his physical being. He was painfully aware of how much he had let himself waste away and he was no longer the perfect male specimen he had once been back in the day. Lenia had only seen him without a tunic very briefly the day they encountered the Necromancers and he had been embarrassed back then but having Lenia try to undress him was too much.

_It's bad enough she deals with everything else I throw at her. The last thing she needs is to be traumatized by my ugly hide._

Once he was completely naked Malath stared down at himself with furrowed brows. He was terribly thin and riddled with scars and burns. It didn't help that he was still underweight and his muscles were only a ghost of his former self. After a few painful seconds spent studying himself in the dim afternoon light that spilled through the windows he quickly splashed into the wooden tub and sank down into the steaming liquid with a loud sigh. He soaked for a long time, enjoying the soothing feeling the bath brought him. He wasn't mad at Lenia in the slightest.

 _I'm just an ass and I'm incapable of not acting like one,_  Malath thought glumly as he tried to wash his hair.

When he was thoroughly clean and dressed in a clean set of clothes Malath forced himself to leave the bedroom and seek out Lenia so they could make amends. He found her sitting alone near the fire in the front hall and she idly sipped on a spoonful of soup as she listened to the bard singing nearby. Malath plopped down on the unoccupied chair beside her and she glanced up at him for a second before doing a double take.

"You... y-your hair," Lenia exclaimed quietly.

Malath rubbed his hand along his shaved head with a small shrug. Lenia lifted her hand towards him and, remembering what had happened earlier, she quickly retracted it and clasped her hands in her lap.

"It was bothering me."

"I could have brushed it for you..."

"It's fine, I like to shave it off every so often."

"Okay," Lenia replied. "If you're satisfied, so am I."

"I'm satisfied," Malath nodded, and he looked up at the servant that walked over to them.

After ordering himself something to eat the pair were silent for a few minutes as neither one really wanted to talk first. Eventually, they both gave in and spoke at the same time.

"You're going to-"

"Lenia, I'm-"

They paused, and a small smile graced Lenia's lips as she chuckled softly.

"You go first," she encouraged.

"I... I'm sorry I shoved you earlier," Malath mumbled quietly, and he nervously rubbed his neck as he stared at the wood grain of the table before him. "I was out of line."

"I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have pressured you."

"You forgive too easily."

"Perhaps," Lenia replied and she paused to take a sip of her tea. "But I know you find it incredibly endearing."

"Perhaps."

It was amusing to watch Malath struggle not to get flustered as the tips of his pointed green ears turned a couple of shades darker. He coughed quietly and thanked the servant when she came around with his meal. After taking a few bites he took a deep drink of water, surprised by how much his body enjoyed the cool liquid as it slid down his parched throat.

"What were you saying earlier?"

"Oh," Lenia replied and she turned her attention away from the bard. "I was going to say you're going to be even colder without any hair on your head now."

"I'm cold anyway."

"We'll ask my colleague if he'll enchant your armor when we get to Saarthal, okay?"

"Okay."

The pair lapsed into a comfortable silence for most of the afternoon. At some point, Malath returned to his room to take a nap since he was still feeling under the weather. Lenia hung around the main hall of the Inn, occasionally striking up a conversation with another patron or chatting with Hadring.

Dinner was a quiet affair. Malath took another potion afterward and it was still early in the night when he grew too tired to stay awake.

"I feel like I've been sleeping all day," He grumbled as they walked back to the sleeping quarters.

"That's not a bad thing, you need rest after starting to travel again so suddenly."

"I know..."

When they reached the door to Malath's bedroom he paused before going inside. Lenia could tell that he was thinking really hard by the furrow of his brow and he hesitated to leave.

"You feeling alright?"

"Yeah," Malath mumbled and he avoided looking directly at her as he spoke. "I uh... I don't think I should uh... be sleeping alone..."

Lenia resisted grinning too much as she nodded in agreement.

"You're probably right."

She refused to give into Malath so easily and so there was an awkward moment of silence as Lenia didn't say anything more and the Orc struggled to speak properly.

"Must I say it?" He finally growled with a small huff.

"Say what?" Lenia replied with an innocent expression.

"You're cruel," Malath shot back and he opened the door.

Before Lenia could respond Malath snatched her hand and dragged her inside the room. She laughed as she watched him hastily tug off his boots and then tossed the covers back so he could lay down.

"Would it kill you to admit you like my warm hugs?" Lenia teased as she slipped her boots off and joined Malath on the bed.

"It would, actually."

Lenia's soft laughter echoed in Malath's ear as he shuffled closer and she wrapped her arms around him. She could feel his body relax into hers and she continued to smile softly as the Orc became more comfortable and started to fall asleep. She gently rubbed his back in small circular motions and after a little while, she too drifted to sleep and did not stir until the next morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> April 2019: I dunno how I fucked up so hard with the protagonist's name in this chapter but it's been fixed! Went back and edited the rest of the chapters but there are no changes worth noting..... thanks for reading!


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